The Doctor's Associate
by impossible123
Summary: The aftermath The aftermath (more of an AU) for S9 episode 2; the Witch's Familiar. A lot of whouffaldi/ 12clara fluff and love...
1. Trapped

**_A/N: I'm so so sorry it took me so long to post something. I'm going through a lot of school stress and writers block when it comes to completing the unfinished stories. But don't worry... I'll try to finish them ASAP._**

 ** _In the meantime, I hope you enjoy this fanfic :)_**

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"Doctor!" She shouted.

He looks.

Clara's Dalek started speeding down the corridor to the Doctor. At least, she was able to grab the Doctor's attention. All the companion had to do now was to get out of the dalek.

If only she knew how...

"This city is about to be sucked into the ground. Your own sewer is about to consume you. There's no way you can win now, nothing you can do. So just tell me - where is Clara Oswald?" He asked desperately.

"I'm Clara! I'm here!" She shouted. The Doctor was going to save her. Of course he was...

He replied. "I know you're a Dalek, where's Clara?"

The companion gasped.

 _The Dalek was translating her thoughts..._

 _She had forgotten all about it..._

"I'm Clara Oswald!" shouting at the top of her lungs, hoping the Doctor would hear her from inside the case. "Yes, you're a Dalek. Where is Clara Oswald?" He repeated. And so did she. "It's me, Clara. Doctor, it's me, I'm Clara, I'm in here!" Clara shouted. But it seemed impossible for her voice to penetrate the chunk of dalekanium metal surrounding her.

"Doctor, stop!" Clara looked at Missy, who had just arrived near the Doctor. The time lady was holding a dalek gun, probably to protect herself from all the raging daleks.

 _Thank God. Missy most probably knew that Clara was in there._

Missy turned towards Clara. "It's _you,_ isn't it." She began. "No offence, you all look alike - but it is _you_ , isn't it?" "Yes, it's me, it's me. Please, it's me!" Tears began forming in Clara's eyes as she shouted from the top of her lungs. She was so so scared.

She was going to move closer to Missy, but the latter pointed a dalek gun at her, which made her move a few steps back, being threatened by the Time Lady.

 _Why was she doing it? Clara wasn't threatening anyone._

 _Had Missy misunderstood?_

 _No... It can't be..._

Missy's look turned sombre before turning towards the Doctor. "Clara's dead, Doctor. And this is the one that killed her."

Wait...

 _WHAT?_

"Do not listen to her. It's me! I'm Cla-!" Her voice broke... And so, Clara listened horrified as Missy took the chance and continued lacing her story with false details. "I got her out of the city, but this one caught us. Shot her down, there was nothing I could do I'm afraid." She was one hell of a deceiver.

"I'm Clara Oswald!" She shouted as Clara saw the Doctor, her Doctor, devastated, staring at her.

At Clara!

He looked at her... But _he just couldn't see her._

Yet, Clara knew he was hearing a completely different story and was on the verge of believing. He was listening to the Dalek's own filtered voice, and Missy's imagination.

 _Please, please Doctor..._

"She ran, she _screamed_. Oh, I'm glad you didn't have to see that." She couldn't believe what she was hearing, but she never gave up. "I'm Clara! Please it's me, Doctor!"

"Oh, it's a mad one, isn't it? Almost like it's proud." Missy continued. But Clara never stopped. "I'm Clara Oswald, Doctor. It's me! It's Clara!" A river of tears streamed down her cheeks.

 _Please... Please... Just see me._

She noticed Missy, going just behind the Doctor, luring him into her trap, looking mischievously at the companion as Missy slipped the dalek gun into the Doctor's rough hand. The time lord, on the other hand, looked at the dalek with such anger...

"Kill it, Doctor. They're all going to die anyway. Indulge yourself, go on... kill. the Dalek."

Clara felt her blood run cold, her heart stop beating.

She couldn't believe it...

Clara's dalek took a few steps back, afraid. "Do not kill me! Don't kill me!" She shrieked.

The Doctor, insensibly, raised the gun, levelling it at the dalek. "Is Clara dead?" His voice was loud and threatening. "I'm Clara, I'm not dead, I'm right here." The hope in her voice was decreasing by the second.

The Time Lord enraged even more...

"I'm your friend. _Your friend!_ " She breathed, as she heard the word enemy from outside; the dalek filter.

Just in the background, in her peripheral vision, she could see Missy enjoying herself with this entertainment, torturing them both against the companion.

Her Doctor steps forward, jamming the exterminator against the eyepiece.

He was ready to kill her.

"No, please, no don't." She breathed. Her heart thumped hard in her chest. Clara couldn't believe this was happening. Of course, the Dalek filter wasn't helping... It only said 'Mercy' whatever that could mean to a dalek...

The Doctor paused.

"... you shouldn't be able to say that." He said. Clara hastily drew a breath inward as her hope boosted up just a little.

 _Maybe she was going to live to fight another day._

"Mercy." She continued to think of the word that might save her life, being translated as rasp, robot-like phonics. "That word shouldn't exist in your vocabulary. How could Davros have taught you that?" "Mercy." Clara continued trembling.

Please please Doctor let me out of here.

The Doctor's eyes flick to the dalek's gun. "Why aren't you trying to kill me?" His tone of voice was still hard.

Clara's voice was on the verge of breaking. "Because I would never kill you. You are the last person I would ever kill." She saw the Doctor looking at Missy, as he immediately noticed there was something terribly wrong, that she was playing with his feelings.

"I put the gun down. Open your casing." The Doctor said. "How?" Clara frantically looked around the Dalek in search of a big red button which had the word Open written all over it.

The Doctor shot a glance towards the time lady.

A real dalek would have known how to open the damn thing.

"Just think the word open." She heard him say nonetheless. "It'll work."

Clara blinked the tears formed from her eyes.

The ordeal was finally over.

Her head just bowed down in tiredness, all the adrenaline wearing off in an instant.

No more shouting and begging for your life, Clara.

The companion felt a breeze of new air coming in as the Dalek casting opened bit by bit amidst the hissing of the machine. She did her best to look up at her best friend, which was absolutely horrified.

"Clara."

She saw the Doctor, her Doctor, wide eyed with a look of pain and guilt.

That look soon changed into absolute raging anger. "Missy. _Run_!" He barked

"Doctor." The word barely left her lips. Clara was still trembling with the fear she had inside the Dalek casing.

The Doctor hurried near Clara, throwing the dalek gun on the floor near the case. He kneeled in front of his companion, cupping his hands gently on either cheek, as if she was too delicate to be touched or disturbed.

"I'm sorry." He breathed, his voice a mix of anguish, guilt and sorrow. She could feel her bottom lip trembling just a slight bit. The Time Lord wiped some of her tears with his thumb. "Clara, I'm so so sorry." He repeated again. The companion would've wanted to tell the Doctor that it would've been fine, that he was still with her, that she was still alive.

 _But it wasn't._

 _It wasn't fine._

 _His 'friend' had almost killed her._

A knot in her throat forbid her to speak, her eyes couldn't stop leaking tears and she couldn't even move. Her hands wouldn't budge from their resting position; the arm rests. Her short fingernails had almost dug into them.

"See? This is why I gave her to you in the first place; to make you see." said Missy casually. "The friend inside the enemy and the enemy inside the friend. Everyone's a bit of both; everyone's... A hybrid." She accentuated the last word.

"I said _run_!" Said the Doctor, still holding Clara's cheeks, looking sideways to Missy.

"It wasn't me who ran, Doctor. _That_ was always you." The time lord barely took cause of the time lady, thus the latter turned and made her way down the corridor, with a smuggish smile on her face.

As soon as Missy had left them alone, the Doctor turned his attention wholly to Clara. He couldn't bare looking at her enlarged eyes. They reminded him of what he was going to do to her, had she given up. He could still feel her trembling with fear, as he held one of the electrodes. "It's going to hurt. But it'll soon be over, OK?" He told her as he awaited her reply. She sniffed. "Please please just do it." She sobbed, eyes closed tightly, fingernails digging further into the rests. He hesitated; trying to think of another way to release her from the bonds without hurting her. But he could find none. So he pulled the electrode slowly off her temple, the companion relieving a suppressed whimper of pain. He turned to the other. "I'm going to take the other off OK?" She nodded hastily in reply. And so the Doctor took the other off with gentleness, still being careful not to hurt Clara more than he had already hurt her when she was still trapped inside the case. She immediately threw herself in the Doctor's arms, sobbing heartily.

He didn't pull her away. He couldn't. So he let her hide her face as the Doctor brought her closer to him and smoothed her back. After all, he needed to hide his face from all the anguish he felt. He was angry with himself. "I'm so sorry, Clara. I didn't..." He stopped as soon as he felt Clara digging her fingernails in his hoodie, clutching it in fists, her knuckles almost changing colour to white.

The Doctor soon did his best to pull Clara away from him after the trembling had somewhat calmed down. Not because he hated hugging... Had he been given the chance, he would have kept her with him, feeling his companion breathe against him, knowing she was still alive, even if she was far from psychologically OK. "Clara, we have to get out of here as soon as we can." The Doctor wiped the new tears that trickled down her saucer eyes.

The companion did her best to nod, only if slightly. "Are you able to run?" He said. "I think so." She said, trying to calm herself down to normal.

She flung herself onto the Doctor, desperate for another hug. "Thank you Doctor for holding onto my life." She breathed into his jacket. Clara soon felt the time lord's hands travel up and down her back. Another tremble under their feet. "I'm sorry I have to say this, Clara. But we haven't got much time." She released herself from the hug feebly, looking at the Doctor. He wasn't angry with her, oh far from that! He was guilty. Very. Very guilty. He was almost too ashamed to look at her.

But Clara slipped her hand in the time lord's, who took the dalek gun from the floor, held both Clara's hand and the gun tight in his hands, pulling her from the casing and so they ran.

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 _ **A/N: yes... This part was only a deeper Clara pov... Don't worry... It's only just beginning *smirks* Hope you enjoyed it and any feedback (here or even pm would do :)) is appreciated as always! Thank you!**_


	2. Haunted

_**A/N: Ahhhhh I'm backkkk with another chapter. I get even more excited to post a chapter from this story which I truly love (even if I haven't written it all yet xD)**_

 _ **Thank you all for your feedback! Hope you enjoy this chapter!**_

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The Doctor and Clara looked over Skaro as the planet was starting to crumble to pieces. The Doctor looked at his companion. "Are you alright?" He tenderly said, as his finger traced the small cut hidden under her fringe. She looked at the Doctor, at her Doctor. "Yeah, of course." She tried to smile to mask all the feelings and all the pain and all the fear she held inside her. But what the Doctor saw was a sad smile, her bottom lip ever so slightly trembling. So the time lord wrapped an arm around his companion whilst holding a dalek gun in the other, he pulled her closer to him, but she never back away. She felt safe now.

They both walked in the TARDIS, and took off just before Skaro ingulfed them, amidst the sound of shrieking daleks crying out 'Exterminate'.

The companion slumped on the jump seat as a faint throbbing lurked into her skull.

"You're finally back, nitwits." They heard a voice from the above level saying. "Glad you've escaped the daleks." said the Doctor sarcastically as he started flipping switches on the console. "Come on Doctor, no need to be angry at me." The time lord, needless to say, started feeling quite the opposite of what she said with this remark. He was angry. Very angry. He was a nanometer short to explode in a heap of anger. "After all..." Said Missy as she kept on reading her book on the lounge on the top floor of the console room. "I did give her back to you."

The TARDIS had let her in and waited for the others to come. "You tried to kill her. Use me to kill her." Said the Doctor, clinching his fists. Their words, especially the Doctor's anger hit the companion's mind with force, throbbing. She held her head in her hands, squeezing her eyes shut. But she never said a word, or let out a whimper. She continued suffering everything in silence.

Clara was never one to make a fuss, especially after getting injured after so many adventures. It was almost normal to get injured in some way or another... be it cuts and bruises, broken bones and tiredness and sore muscles. Another reason was that she never wanted to be considered as a weakling. Not only to herself and others, but also showing the Doctor what a girl worthy of the title of companion she was. She wanted to be strong, just as the Gallifreyan.

"It was hardly my fault." Missy slug. "It was just my way of getting out alive; both me and her. I kept her safe disguised as a dalek, whilst I was outside, having to deal with them all. So, you're welcome." The Doctor punched the console, which made Clara jump. "Safe?" He shouted. "You convinced me to kill her. You _knew_ she was in there!"

"I told you, Doctor. It was a surprise. I had not idea she was in there." Missy continued, still with her defiant tone.

"You should leave, Missy." Said the Doctor as he angrily pushed buttons on the console and inputting coordinates... "Go where?" Said Missy as she closed the book, placed it on the shelf and sat up. The Doctor pulled down the lever. "Let me take you to your coordinates..."

Missy looked at Clara with a small, mischievous smile on her face. And soon saw a golden opportunity.

The Doctor noticed the time lady before he could finish entering the coordinates on the console and turned. When he saw his companion hunched, holding her head, the Doctor's eyes widened, he forgot his anger and ran towards her before kneeling in front of her. "Clara?" He placed his hands over hers as the companion sobbed quietly.

Very quietly.

The Doctor kissed her hair. "What's wrong?" He asked. Clara slowly opened her eyes which, needless to say, were the reddest and most inflated he'd ever seen them. The companion looked feebly at the Doctor, still holding her head. "It hurts." She sniffed. "It feels like it's going to explode." Her eyes closed once again as another throb made its way through her mind, sending sparks of agony.

The Doctor scrambled through his inside jacket pocket and took out the sonic sunglasses, frantically wearing them and sonicing his companion, sending a buzzing sound which echoed through the console room. "The connection with the dalek may have effected your neural cortex. The pain is instant when the wires were connected to your telepathic range but it eases out slower when taken off. The brain is still trying to repair the damage done." The time lord removed the sunglasses, placed them back in the pocket and rested his palms on Clara's arms before pressing a hard kiss on her forehead. He was sure that Clara hadn't heard the explanation for the pain she was feeling. But he continued to speak nonetheless, hoping she would be soothed by his words of comfort. "I promise, I'll fix you, Clara." He breathed in her hair. "Am I going to become a dalek?" She breathed. He pulled away from her, looking into her vulnerable doe eyes. "No, you won't Clara." He placed a palm over his chest. "Hand on my hearts." Clara's thin lips curled into the weakest smile possible, as did the Doctor's. Such a moment did not hold for long though; the companion hissed as another wave of pain aroused, closing her eyes. The Doctor hugged her once again, head to his chest, breathing in her hair. "It'll be over soon, I promise. I promise." He repeated as if to ensure that he would keep the promise given, before being interrupted by his archenemy (his first archenemy, actually).

"But should it be this painful, Doctor?" Missy asked as she slowly stepped down the stairs with utmost delicacy, having a weak evil smile on her face. "It's going to be fine, Clara." He continued comforting her but soon turned to Missy. "I said 'Get Lost'!" He shouted. "Ow." Clara whimpered as the Doctor's loud booming words made the headache even worse. "Oh I'm sorry, Clara. I'm so so sorry." The Doctor breathed as he smoothed her hair as he was frantically trying to find out how to calm his companion. He hoped that Clara wasn't listening to his heartbeat; it was a frantic tattoo... Anything but calming.

He soon heard yet another small whimper from his friend. "Please please, make them stop. Not again. I don't want to turn into a dalek." "Clara, don't worry, it's not going to happen." He whispered. But Clara kept on repeating the same chant. "No no please. I'm human. I'm human. I am not a dalek."

The Doctor's hearts shattered as his eyes widened and filled with tears. The last time he had heard Clara repeat those same exact words were during dreams of her human echo; a human converted into a dalek. The girl who had saved him from eminent death under the hands of arguably his oldest and greatest enemies. Those dreams had become much rarer, and less physically painful. It's been years since Trenzalore, but it seemed like they had gone back to the moment just after Clara's sacrifice.

He turned to look at Missy, shocked and angry at the same time. She simply shrugged. As the Doctor turned his back towards Missy once again, the latter's thin lips curled back into a smile. "Please please Doctor stop this!" Clara pleaded, more like a shout of pain. Her tone of voice broke the Doctor's heart. "Make them stop!"

Such despair.

"You did this Missy." He desperately said to her, before turning to look at the time lord. "Why why when all I try to do is help you?"

He turned back to his companion.

"Clara..." Nothing.

"Clara?" He tried to slip his palm under hers to try and plunge her into a deep sleep which would hopefully calm her. His hands hadn't even made their way under hers; the girl calmed down slowly, opening her eyes before they rolled in the back of her head and soon slumped on him, relaxed, cheeks laced with tears.

"Clara? Clara!" The Doctor soniced her as her head rested on his shoulder.

She was very properly knocked off. Her brain had been overworked.

"Why did you do this to her?" He said as the Doctor smoothed her hair and dried her cheeks. She looked so relaxed, so peaceful. "What did she do to deserve it?" "She's the puppy who obeyed. Not my problem." Said Missy as she put her hands on her hips. "Did she even have a choice?" He held Clara in his arms. The Doctor took her palms and knitted her fingers behind his neck before heaving her up delicately. "Don't worry, Clara." He whispered. "I'll make you better." The Time Lord pressed a gentle kiss on her forehead.

" _Clara Clara Clara."_ Missy teased. The Doctor left the console room to medbay without even taking cause of his fellow Gallifreyan. Missy ran after him. "You pamper her too much, Doctor!" She shouted from the other side of the corridor. She didn't even bother to continue running after him, and he didn't even bother to hear.

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 _ **A/N: Mwahahahaaaaaaaaaa... A cliffhangerrrrrrrrr xD (I am so so sorry) Hope you enjoyed reading this chapter! Any feedback is appreciated and till then, take care!**_


	3. I'll keep you safe

**_A/N: I'm backkkk! Ahhh I'm so so happy for your response! Thank you all for all the love you've given me!_**

 ** _Without further ado, off the chapter 3!_**

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 _I'll keep you safe_

 _Try hard to concentrate_

 _Hold out your hand_

 _Can you feel the weight of it_

 _The whole world at your fingertips_

 _Don't be, don't be afraid_

 _Our mistakes they were bound to be made_

 _But I promise you I'll keep you safe_

\- Sleeping at Last

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The Doctor delicately placed her on one of the infirmary beds and brought a status monitor close to him. Clara looked relatively OK... Some bruises and cuts yes, but she was physically relatively stable,

 _Well... except for her mind._

It was jumbled up pudding, memories in the wrong parts of the brain, constantly fired up, moving from one part to the next, her brain active with surges of energy between neural cells; hence the headache. She needed time to settle after the neural mix up during the dalek telepathic connection.

So _that's_ why she could remember who Oswin was. Or more importantly, how she could relive every single detail of her echo's life.

He (his previous incarnation, actually) had suppressed her dreams and echoes. But now they had resurfaced, and it will take time for her brain to restabilise.

The Doctor connected her to an IV to stabilise her and fight off any nanobots that could effect his companion. As he was delicately covering her with a blanket, wrapped around her torso, Clara stirred and groaned.

"Hey, hey, Clara. Don't move, it's fine." As he smoothed her hair. But Clara soon pressed her IVd palm against her forehead. "My head hurts." She mumbled, her eyes closed tight, trying to numb the pain.

"I know, Clara. I know." He breathed before pressing a small kiss on the back of her hand pressed on her forehead. The Doctor sat near his companion at the edge of the bed, trying his best to calm her and sooth her.

She gradually got temporarily better. "It needs time to heal. I can't do anything but to help you sleep. The mind's still confused by the dalek telepathic connection. But I'll help you." The Doctor continued. "I have a duty of care."

Clara smiled. "I have a duty of care too Doctor." He shook his head. "You don't understand." She smoothed his hand. "Yes. I do." He looked into her eyes. "I was never going to leave you alone, especially when you looked so heartbroken. You thought you were going to die but admit it.." she smirked. "I actually saved your arse." The Doctor breathed a laugh as did Clara. But his smile faded as soon as it had come.

"I'm sorry, about what happened." Said the Doctor as he continued drawing random shapes and lines on her palm. His eyes were as broken as his hearts, and held his companion's hand for comfort. "I was so angry... i was going to kill you." "You had no idea, Doctor." Clara tried to reassure him. "It wasn't your fault. It was anything but." "I still hurt you." His eyes were broken. Her hands slithered to take his rough hand. "You didn't, Doctor. Missy did. She tried to hurt us." The Doctor's patterns slowed to a halt, before he just stood gazing at his companion's palm. A horrible silence took over the room. The TARDIS's engines continued humming, the ECG continued pulsing but neither the Impossible Girl or the last of the Time Lords talked. Clara just gazed at the Doctor, hoping what his next move would be. After such a deathly silence of what seemed went on for hours, the Gallifreyan simply mumbled, "I know."

"And you're still giving her second chances?"

"I can help her become the compassionate person she once was, Clara."

"But you cannot do the impossible."

"Well..." The Doctor smiled. "Unlike you." They giggled.

"Shut up and stop changing the subject, Doctor." Clara breathed a laugh. The Doctor joined.

"I promise Clara," Pressing a kiss on her forehead. "I will make you feel better. All you have to do is rest. I promise you, you'll wake up much better." His thumb brushed her cheek. "Then we can go to... wherever you want." He said. "Your choice."

"And don't go changing my choice like you always try do." Clara smiled, as did the time lord. "Thank you Doctor. For everything."

"Anything, my Clara." He snugged her under the quilt in medbay. The time Lord lowered himself and pressed one last kiss, before starting to smooth hair to sleep.

* * *

It was such bliss being near his companion. The TARDIS had dimmed the light only slightly so that it would not disturb Clara's sleep, but at the same time he could notice every move she made; every breath, every twitch. She was just there; lying so still... So beautiful... He smiled. The time lord took the opportunity of speaking to her in Gallifreyan, now that her echoes were once again temporarily exposed.

He delicately began to engrave Gallifreyan words on her forehead, leaving weak traces of gold light.

Circles which together, meant something so special to the Doctor that he couldn't bring himself to say it through direct words... Hoping that the fact that her echoes had resurfaced, her subconscious could reveal what he had expressed, and she would hold it in her heart. For he was too scared to tell her, or even engrave when she was awake.

He continued to caress her hair, when Missy soon entered the room.

"The -"

"Shhhhhhh..." The Doctor whispered.

"Hokae... Sorry Mr. President." Missy whispered cheesily.

The time lady immediately noticed that Clara was cocooned by the soft blankets that surrounded her. The time lord had sat down near her and continued to smooth her hair, feeling at peace seeing Clara out of her pain again. The latter seemed so peaceful, and the Doctor hoped it would last as long as his companion's mind needed to restabilise.

"Seems like the puppy's asleep at last." Missy mumbled. The Doctor looked at her, panged with pain and the inevitable guilt; where he could have taken care of Clara and he hadn't let his friend do whatever she liked with his companion. But he didn't want to turn down Missy; he was determined to bring some goodness into her heart, maybe slowly, but surely, her heart would soften and kindness would win her over. But for now, she was the same old Master he always knew. And he had to protect Clara, and the Universe, from her. "Why would you do this to us, Missy?" He breathed.

"Oh... You know I like to play with your pets every so often or when I pop back to life." "She's my friend." He breathed. "Even a _wee_ more than _that_ , I suppose." Missy murmured before she continued to speak normally. "Being your friend only makes it better, Doctor. Don't you see? I just want to play a bit with you too, like we used to do... Chase each other from one corner of the Universe to the other." "The problem is you've taken your game to far, Missy. You're endangering everyone else." Said the Doctor. "Oh... But that's the fun of it all! I deserve it, don't you think?" She smirked.

His teeth were clinched tight together, still very angry for Missy, both for what she said and for what she had done to Clara. "Go to hell." He said.

Missy laughed. "Oh... I'm already in-"

Clara stirred slightly, and the Doctor's harsh look softened as he smoothed her hair, calming her down. "Go back to sleep, Clara." He purred delicately. She moaned as the companion nuzzled her nose further into his shirt, smiling slightly before falling back into oblivion. "Oh you two look like lovebirds." Missy smiled. "You should start-" But the Doctor stopped her. "Shut up and get lost." "As you wish... Mr. President." Missy chuckled and left the room.

"Don't you worry about her, Clara." The Doctor breathed in Clara's hair and pressed a wet kiss. "I'll keep you safe."

* * *

After a while, the Doctor exited the Infirmary. Clara looked to be quite stable, thank goodness. He headed to the kitchen to make a cup of tea. He brought the electric kettle to a boil and prepared the tea. But he couldn't stop thinking about what had happened on Skaro.

 _"Compassion then."_

 _"Always."_

 _"It grows strong and fierce in you, like a cancer."_

 _"I hope so."_

 _"It will kill you in the end."_

 _"I wouldn't die of anything else."_

After what he had done to his home, a burden he thought he would need to carry the rest of his life, even through his aging years before being granted the regeneration cycle. But Clara... Always Clara... She had to be the one who stood up to everything. If it hadn't been for her, he would have burned Gallifrey yet again that day there were three of him. Yet, he had saved it... What he thought was once a fixed point in time, he had changed.

All he needed was to find Gallifrey.

And Missy had given him some kind of hope. But it was horrible. He thought he was so so close to achieving what he truly wanted... And all that hope was taken away from him.

Now, maybe... When he would found it, he would show Clara what life on Gallifrey is, it would be an adventure on its own. An adventure he sought to have once again for so so many years.

He would show Clara the fields of Gallifrey, the Capital...

And then... The Hybrid. Why was Davros, father of the Daleks, so obsessed with a Gallifreyan prophecy? Did he really think that the Hybrid would come from his side? Because... After all... The Daleks sought to be pure... Pure hatred. They would never accept such a thing as half-timelord, half-dalek.

 _What about what he had done to Clara? It was unforgivable... Clara should have-_

A weak scream echoed through the corridors. A scream only his sharp ears would have heard.

He left the mug on the bench and ran through the corridor.

 _Clara!_

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 _ **A/N: Too many cliffhangers xD (sorry not sorry) I'm feeling so evillllll. Kudos and feedback fuel my motivation, so please feel free to comment (constructive criticism also accepted)! Hopefully will post next Tuesday or Wednesday! Till then take care!**_


	4. Resurfaced echoes

**_A/N: Guess who's back. Back again. Thank you for the loves and comments! Here' a new chapter!_**

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 _"Doctor please, come!"_ It felt like Trenzalore all over again. Running towards where the piercing scream originated. He could feel his hearts pumping blood and adrenaline, praying to any god that existed... Praying so Clara would be safe until he arrived. Then he would be the one to keep her safe.

 _"I'm scared, Doctor!"_ Another piercing scream.

The time lord scrambled to find the infirmary. He entered sick bay, finding Missy pinning Clara to the bed, the latter shouting and screaming and kicking with all her might, even though her eyes were shut closed as if she was still asleep and locked in a world of her own. "What are you doing to her?" He said as the Doctor hurried opposite to his fellow time lord, sonicing her mind as Missy held Clara from hurting herself. "I'm trying to protect her from herself. _That's_ _what_!" The girl was kicking with all her might with all 4 limbs, trying to break free from whatever or whoever was holding her in her fantasies, and for such a small physiqued girl, the time lady never thought she packed such strength. "Hurry Doctor, I don't think I can hold her much longer." Missy breathed.

 _"Let me go._ _LET ME GO!"_ The companion screamed, before spitting on Missy (the latter didn't take cause), the time lord thinking that she was going hoarse. The Doctor continued sonicing Clara. "Come on, come on..." He breathed between gritted teeth. He finally found the right frequency, smoothing her hair whilst pressing the side of the sunglasses. "You can do it, Clara."

He continued shushing her and smoothing her hair until the horrible dream seemed to fade away as Clara's muscles relaxed, leaving her as motionless as before, her forehead and hair damp with sweat. Missy took off her hold from the girl, looking _unnaturally_ worried. The Doctor swiftly took off his new sonic and placed it in the inner pocket of his jacket before scooping the companion in his arms delicately and holding her close to him. He nuzzled his nose in her sweet smelling hair, desperate for the consoling scent as Clara's head rested against the Doctor's chest. He doubted that she could hear his hearts. But as he felt hers... The steady rhythm of the pulse in her neck, whilst his frantic tattoo soon calmed down as soon as he knew it was all over.

After some time, the Doctor looked blankly at Missy. "What did you do to her?" The time lady stared with mouth wide open. "I did nothing, Doctor, I swear." Her voice was weaker, purer than when she mostly talks. The time lady observed such pain in her childhood friend, that she actually felt her hearts clinch. She could easily note the time lord's immense grief as he held Clara's unconscious form. "Doctor, do yo-"

"Get out!" The Doctor barked, his hold on Clara strengthening itself, as if she was his possession. Missy flinched when he shouted. She had rarely heard him so angry; usually when he was so angry for something she had done, she would continue defying him. But now was a different story. It was a different tone. It was true she had chosen Clara to be his companion so they would bond strongly... But she never thought it would bring the Doctor to accuse her of something she didn't do. Was it because she had lied so many times? She still couldn't move with the shock. She didn't feel like herself; she felt scared, hurt. "I said, 'Get Out'!" The Doctor barked at her once again. "As you wish." She mumbled innocently, and soon left the sick bay mournfully.

The time lord held Clara closer to him, just holding her like a child in his arms. He placed the companion's head under his, fitting perfectly in the crevice of his neck, then turning to kiss her hair before snugging her scaringly unmoving body against him again. "It's alright, Clara. It's fine. I'm here, and I will never let you go. Promise." He pressed his lips to her hair, bringing in her faint vanilla smell. "I promise Clara. I promise." He sobbed. "Just please hold tight." "Please..." His voice trailed.

* * *

The Doctor looked at Clara plainly as he sat a few steps away from her hospital bed. He didn't even know how to feel. He was scared and anxious and worried and guilty and just a tad hopeful. He had to be hopeful.

Clara was asleep, at last, maybe she was in her mind place, fighting back. Or just sleeping.

Oh sleep... The gift of humans... One of the many gifts the human race was indulged with, even if many classified them as curses.

Sleep, short life span and in some cases, forgetfulness...

Forgetting about everything which is too _damn hard_ to bear.

How he wished he knew that Clara was in such danger with Missy. And he wished harder that he had known Clara... _his_ Clara, was in there, inside the Dalek. If he had known before... He wouldn't have threatened the Dalek. He wouldn't have threatened... Her. There was no need for her to tell him, he could feel she was so so scared of losing her life, and even more terrified that the Doctor, her Doctor, her best friend was going to kill her.

 _But after all..._ A tiny voice in his mind said, _The filtering and all... How could you have known, daft old man?_ He breathed a laugh. The voice of Clara Oswald... As remarkable as the Impossible Girl herself.

His thoughts were abruptly interrupted by Clara's shifting and groaning, however small and weak they were... His eyes opened wide, left his seat and sat next to Clara, wrapping his arm around her. "It's OK, Clara." He shushed her delicately. But she wouldn't stop. He brought her closer to his chest, as he did before, scared that she would start screaming herself hoarse again. "Doctor. Run. Doctor. You mustn't stay..." She mumbled. "I'm your friend." Tears poured out of both the Doctor's and Clara's eyes. "Oh Clara. My Clara." He breathed as he tried his best to dry the tears off his companion's cheeks. "Don't listen to her... Your friend." The Doctor continued to listen the desperate cries of his companion as she replayed the horrible scene in her head. She whimpered in pain and nuzzled closer to the Doctor, who soon held her closer in his arms.

They remained in such an aura for what the Doctor felt like an eternity before Clara shifted once again in his arms. She breathed in, immediately noticing in whose hands she was. "My daft old man." He heard faintly before feeling her fingers wrap around his shirt, clinging to him. The Doctor kissed her forehead lightly. "Clara." He croaked, blinking away the tears. Clara tried to pull away from him, observing him with half opened eyes. "I've never thought I'd see you cry, stupid old man." She breathed a laugh, but even the Doctor could tell that she was holding back the tears. "You and your humour, Clara Oswald..." He breathe, smiling a weak grin. "Why are you crying, Doctor?" she asked. "Why were _you_ crying, Clara?" Her smile faded, but her eyes still pinned in his. "Tell me the truth." He said, as his thumb swept the tears off her cheek. She closed her eyes as more tears trickled down. "You're in pain, aren't you?" She nodded, sniffing. "Still dreaming about Skaro and...?" His voice trailed, but Clara understood the second scenario he was going to mention and nodded. She looked into his eyes again, her eyes wild and panicked. "I can't go through Trenzalore anymore, Doctor. I can't." She flung herself in the Doctor's arms, and the time lord was quick to envelope her with his warmth. "I've died and died again so many times." He heard her breathed. The Doctor rocked her and shushed her as she wept with all her might. After many tiring minutes (in which the Doctor thought he was going to emotionally die in grief with Clara), she calmed down. Not because she wanted to stop, but because she wasn't able to cry anymore. She could barely muster more energy to shed a few more tears or scream a few more cries of despair. She felt powerless, yet cocooned by the only person who could keep her safe, no matter what happened in the last adventure. "I think I've died so many times in my dreams that I won't be that scared in real life." She breathed a small laugh. The Doctor's lips formed a sad smile. "You know you don't have to hide your pain, Clara." He breathed in her hair, with his low putting voice. The companion could feel his long fingers passing through her hair, brushing against her skull. "But that's what _you_ do." She replied weakly, not sure if she wanted to be heard. The time lord was sure that Clara had heard his hearts skip a beat. _How could she say or even think anything of the sort?_ _Why would she do that to herself?_ "I don't want you to bear this by yourself, Clara. It's my fault that all of-" The companion's hold on the Doctor's shirt increased. "It isn't." She barely breathed, but it was a phrase the time lord heard anyway. "I just want to be with you." She continued before pulling away, looking desperately in the Doctor's eyes. With his two paddle-like hands, he cupped her damp cheeks. The time lord traced the bone under her eyes with his thumb. He looked right into her bloodshot, inflated eyes. "You're tired, Clara." "I don't want to stay here anymore, Doctor." The Doctor felt taken aback. "Not in medbay."

A sigh of relief.

"I'll take you to your bedroom then." But Clara's eyes opened wide and her fingers curled tighter around his shirt. "No Doctor. Not there." She panicked. But the Doctor held her shoulders, calming her down. "What's wrong Clara. Tell me." The companion wouldn't stop. "Clara." She looked at him with her wild eyes. "Take deep breaths, OK?" The Doctor said. And so, he started inhaling deeply before exhaling. She soon followed his lead. "Good." He encouraged her, her smooth cold hands in his. "Keep going." Clara did as she was told, until she calmed down. "Now tell me what's wrong." He said gently. Clara was still reluctant to say what was bothering her. The Doctor moved closer to her and pressed the most delicate kiss on her hairline. It felt as if all the tension Clara felt just melted for a brief moment, and opened her mind to the Doctor. _I don't want to wake up in the same place I've been having so many dreams of my echoes._ The Doctor pulled back gently, his gaze locked into Clara's slightly panicked eyes. He could feel that was definitely holding her breath, for she didn't know how the time lord would respond to such a request. The Doctor nodded. "I understand." The girl sighed in relief. He took Clara's IVd hand. He slowly pulled out the IV, trying not to hurt Clara, before taking her in his arms in a bridal style. "You just sleep, Clara. No need to worry. I'll find you somewhere." The companion smiled before nuzzling her nose in his chest.

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 _ **A/N: Hope you enjoyed it! Feedback is appreciated as always! Till next time, take care!**_


	5. Aching Heart

_**A/N: Hope you're all well! A new chapter up ahead! Enjoy!**_

* * *

The Doctor walked through the corridor slowly. "Now it should be around here somewhere." He breathed to himself. Clara was still half asleep in his arms. But the more the Doctor walked through the corridor, the more lost he felt. It was just an empty corridor, until to one side he found a door. On it were small golden circles, very intricate... A name and surname written in the machine's native tongue.

 _Clara Oswald_

The Doctor's eyebrows knitted in confusion. _Was he lost?_ And so he continued to walk down the corridor in search of the room he needed for his Clara.

But before long he was walking through another empty corridor, before finally finding himself near the same room. The Doctor sighed. "I don't like the game you're playing." He said to the ceiling. The companion stirred in his arms, and the Doctor felt his anger and impatience melt as he looked over her.

"Don't worry Doctor. The library lounge is enough for me." She muttered, her eyes still closed.

"No. This is _unacceptable_. I need my room, _now_. If it's Missy..." Clara shushed him, and his angry eyebrows turned into soft clouds of cotton candy as he turned to look at her once again.

"No need to get angry Doctor. Let's go back to medbay. Or take me somewhere else. Anywhere where there's you." Clara said dreamily, snuggling closer to her Doctor and letting her thin fingers gently curl around his shirt. He left out a weak sigh of desperation before continuing down the corridor. But only a few paces away was the same door, to the opposite wall. The TARDIS shrilled _. Just get in, idiot._ _She needs a bed._

"Don't you _ever_ call me _that_ again." Said the Doctor through gritted teeth. The time machine opened the door ajar and the Doctor, who was at first very reluctant of entering due to the time machine's nasty comment, pushed it with his shoulder, being careful not to wake his companion. Because even if he was used to heave his light companion up, one must remember that even the lightest of objects may become tiring overtime. And besides, he wanted to give Clara a better surface, rather than his bony skeleton, to rest on.

He never expected what he saw when the Doctor entered. It was an exquisite bedroom, having dark blue and white marbled velvet walls, a sky projection on the ceiling, a soft double bed with several soft pillows and quilts, and Clara's usual desk and 7 days drawer, all having the companion's things, including her laptop and pictures of her and the Doctor, all arranged neatly on the 7 days and some on the walls in small frames. "Oh Clara this is amazing!" He breathed in her hair, leaving a tender kiss, which left the companion unstirred. She was properly asleep now.

The time lord laid the girl on the plush bed and covered her with the cloud-like quilts. He laid near her and smoothed her hair delicately. It was only after a few minutes that Clara responded; her lips curling into a sweet smile. "I never thought your bed is so much more comfortable than mine." She said, without opening her eyes.

"It isn't." The Doctor smiled. "This bed is yours, Clara." The companion's eyebrows arched downward in confusion.

"But-"

Yet, the Doctor shushed her as he let the palm of his hand drift over her forehead. "The TARDIS wanted to have your own new room." He smiled. "She thought it was time for you to have a little upgrade." A weak smile formed on Clara's face.

"She's getting sweeter by the minute." The smile faded soon enough ."Did she leave all my things in place?"

"Looks so." He replied. "Good." The companion replied. "She's a good girl, I take everything I said over the past years. She's taking good care of me."

The time lord pressed a sweet kiss on her forehead. He could never resist giving these tokens of appreciation to his companion, to thank her indirectly for staying in his life, to put up with him, and mostly for her to know that she is loved without having to say any words. A gesture as the deepest forehead kisses the time lord gives replace a thousand 'I love You' s; a phrase which the Doctor was never able to say or confess other than with gestures. The girl hummed sweetly, a wider, brighter grin forming on her face. "Now you must rest." The Doctor said sweetly, with his purring low Scottish voice. Clara hummed.

"And you must stay near me, daft..." Her voice trailed as she felt into a deep peaceful sleep, leaving her with a sweet smile. The Doctor smiled before kissing her forehead yet again.

"Will do, teach." He slipped near Clara on the soft bed, and spent so many minutes, maybe even hours looking at her... Motionless, yet peaceful and so, so beautiful.

And it was at that point, after repeating himself how lucky he was to have Clara Oswald in his life, that he let himself succumb to the same sleep.

* * *

The girl tried to open her eyes the best she could. She felt disorientated and her head throbbed.

Where the hell was she?

She opened her eyes... Everything was blurred at first. Pressing the palm of her hand to her forehead, she tried to sit up slowly. A man was sleeping near her... An old man... And it scared her.

 _How the hell did she get there?_

She had to get out of there... And fast.

The man opened his eyes.

"Clara... It's fine... It's OK."

Her eyes widened.

 _Clara..._

He tried to move slowly towards her... Bit by bit... As she had gone further from him... On the other side of the bed... Petrified.

"It's going to be fine, Cla-."

" _Stop._ Calling me that!" She shouted. "Ow..." The girl shut her eyes and pressed her palm to her forehead again. "Why do you _call_ me that?"

The Doctor tried to move towards her.

"Stop!" The girl breathed in pain. "Don't you even _dare_ take a step closer towards me."

He didn't dare to move closer. His feet planted to the ground, yet ever so slightly reaching out to his friend... Or what once _was_ his dearest friend. "Clara... I'm just trying to-"

"Stop calling me that. I am _**not**_ -" the girl's mouth opened, a sparkle in her eyes returned, before laughing, her hand soon slipping off her forehead. "Wait... Am I...?"

She breathed a laugh once again. "Oh. My." Another laugh. And all this whilst the Doctor observed with his mouth open; actually, properly baffled.

"Oh... Yes!" She squealed. "I'm out at last! Ahhh... What a feeling to be alive."

The Doctor's eyebrows knitted in confusion. "What are you talking about, Clara?" But she turned towards him.

"You," she pointed at the Doctor. "Shush." The girl said before she jumped off the bed. She stood in front of a large mirror, looking at herself, twisting. "Ugh... I hate this outfit. Too flowy." She gasped, before combing her fingers through her hair. "The hair! Oh my stars, I never thought I could look _this_ good in short hair!" She huffed. "It's too darn hot in here." And so took off the jumper, leaving her only with the short sleeved green patterned dress. She twirled. "That's soooo much better."

"Clara, I-" the Doctor's words were soon cut off by the girl's barking.

"I'm not _Clara_ , Doctor," emphasising the companion's name, saying it almost disrespectfully. "Not now." She smirked.

The time lord was baffled, but he soon turned his attention back on her when she groaned, holding on to the wall, and another hand holding her head. He soon heard her mutter all sorts of things under her breath, but one thing stood out of the rest. "Shut up you, you can't get out now."

The Doctor soon straightened up. "Whoever you are, lea-" but as he made the first steps towards the girl, or who ever was now talking, the latter held out the hand which was previously pressing her forehead.

"Stop. There." Before shouting to herself again. "Stop fighting, damn it! You're so _damn_ selfish." The voice in her head didn't seem to give up all that easily.

So the girl held her head again, her eyes shut tight in concentration. She groaned a little, before finally relaxing, her hands leaving her forehead at last. "That's better." She sighed in relief.

"Who are you?" The Doctor asked, slightly afraid that his friend might have lost her memory (which didn't really look like it), or worse, she had turned into a monster.

The girl stared at the man. "Clara tells me you're the Doctor, aren't you? She's just moaning your name over and over... So selfish of her... After all these years."

The time lord was shocked. Not only did a stranger suddenly pop out of nowhere, but Clara was held captive; in her own skin!

"You _really_ have forgotten me, didn't you Doctor?" She said with a slight tone of anger. "After _all_ these years, I've never thought you've forgotten me this quickly, even thought I was always in Clara's head, Doctor. I watched everything, while I was there... At the back of her mind where you placed me." The girl made a few paces to the horrified Doctor. "Clara never told you that she kept having nightmares about me, didn't she? That I was trying to break free of the chains you placed me in. In the mental prison with all the others. I was the only one angry enough to escape. The others were happy in such a situation they are in, quite frankly." Tears of anger formed in the girl's eyes. No... A total mix of despair, hurt, and anger. "Clara Oswald's _gone_ , Doctor. I'm holding her back. And you know she's too weak to fight." She shut her eyes once again in pain, pressing her temple with her right index finger. A tear trickled as the girl tried to control the throbbing in her head. It soon ceased. "It'll soon be over... She'll soon give up, I know she will. That's what happens when you're too injured and weak." The being sighed. "I just need some fresh air and get out of this claustrophobic place." The girl turned and wobbled her way to the door.

"Then who are you?" The Doctor pleaded, as she was holding onto the door frame.

She turned.

"Me?" She breathed a laugh, but it was more of a mocking gesture for the fact that she, one of the most important beings in the Universe was forgotten so quickly.

 _She who was born from a Leaf._

 _She who was born from an act of sacrifice._

 _And love._

"I'm Oswin Oswald."

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 _ **A/N: Hope you enjoyed it! Feedback appreciated as always!**_


	6. Who is in Control?

Oswin held to the wall, her palm still stuck to her forehead. Clara was fighting back. The time lord knew his Clara wouldn't give up that easily... No matter how tired she was. But he also knew that she could do nothing if her energy reserves deplete. After all, the companion was already very tired trying to rearrange her mind, and he didn't know how much longer she could hold on and continue to fight back for conscious control over her body and mind.

"Where am I?" She breathed as she frantically searched for the door. "Where the _hell_ is the way out?" She turned to herself (to the weakened mind of 12's companion) and started speaking angrily. "Just tell me where I am, damn it. It's not like it's such a difficult task."

"You. Are. Clara, Oswin." He tried his best to convince her.

Oswin stopped and turned to the Doctor before she breathed out... "You're trying to get me out of her head Doctor? _I_ , that I saved your arse by letting the Daleks take my life? I wasn't even _dead,_ Doctor. They turned me into their machine, they tried to take away all the good I had and replace it with pure hatred. Do you even _know_ how _painful_ that was?" The girl's voice was very close to start breaking, but she tried to stay strong. She wanted to intimidate the Doctor, not win his pity. "The only life I had, taken away from me. I am not going to lose this chance, Doctor, whether _you_ or the selfless human like it or not. I am _not_ Clara anymore, Doctor." Oswin's eyes were stone cold, boaring into the Doctor's. Her plan was working alright; he felt so broken and intimidated by the girl, that he felt trapped. But he wasn't going to give up. Not when there was his human's life at stake. The girl turned and continued to walk, holding her head once again. "But I just need some air." She breathed heavily to herself.

But the Doctor never gave up. He could never give up on his Clara. "Oswin... _Please_ let me-" His plead was stopped by Oswin. "Just... _shut up_ , will you?" She shouted angrily. He'd never heard Clara bark in such a way to him... Well... Maybe that day when he had abandoned her on the Moon. A saddened shout, one which had showed so much hurt.

And Oswin felt the same.

The Doctor calmed down as he walked after Oswin, who was taking small wobbled steps, always holding on to the corridor wall. "I need to... Umm..." She shook her head to keep all the other thoughts at bay. "I need to get myself acquainted with this place. I'll be fine."

The time lord never gave up. He knew Oswin was not the type; it was just the hurt talking. Because Clara did just the same. But he could never forget, that Oswin was an independent being, even if she _did_ stem off his companion.

"Clara... I mean Oswin. Just _stop_. It's not _you_." The girl stopped. " _Yes_ , it's _me_ Doctor... After all these years, don't I deserve life? After _you_ took it away? I died to save _you_ and I was very glad in doing it... And _you_ showed no respect... _At all_!" Oswin pressed her forehead again... "This _damned_ headache..." She spat out.

"Oswin.. Just let me help-." The Doctor rushed to her before he stopped abruptly as Oswin held a finger towards him. "You stay right there!" The girl soon turned and continued moving through the corridor, holding the wall with one hand and holding her forehead with the other. Step by step, she fought and she tried.

But the Doctor was always there... A few steps behind her.

"Clara... I know you're in there..." The Doctor whispered. Oswin stopped and turned. _Please, don't give up, my Impossible Clara..._

"You know? You love your " _Clara_ " so much..." Oswin began, her back turned towards him and feeling tears stream down her cheeks. "She only threw herself inside the time steam just to save you. She ended up killing us and in no way, _you_ or _her,_ were we acknowledged. She didn't even _die_ for you, Doctor."

The time lord felt his hearts break. It was a voice of despair and utter sorrow. But he had always respected his Clara... Even her echoes. But maybe not as much.

 _But how would Oswin know anyway?_

"You want Clara back, Doctor. Not me..." Her voice broke.

"You know why I want her back?" The time lord began. "Because she's hurt right now. She's just been through a trauma, you know if you've already been in her mind. She's been trapped inside the dalek. Not converted, yes, but in a dalek. And I almost killed her. She's in so much pain. And I need to relieve her of it. And to do that, first you have to relieve yourself from her, let yourself be an echo."

"I'm a person too, Doctor. Not just any old echo. I had my parents, I had cousins, friends... I was _so_ happy." Oswin sobbed, looking at the floor, replaying the happy memories the Daleks were unable to retrieve and turn into poison. "I was so _so_ happy before the daleks came along. I travelled through the stars, I dreamed of seeing more. And my life, my only life, was _robbed_ from me. I was so happy... "

"I understand.." The Doctor breathed.

" _No_. You _don't_." She spat, turning to confront him. "You will _never_ understand Doctor, what it feels like when all your life is destroyed. When you're in so _so_ much pain..." Oswin cried harder, the throbbing in her head getting ever stronger, causing her to hold her head.

"That pain, Oswin. The pain you're feeling... You know Clara is feeling it, right?" The Doctor said with tears brimming in his eyes, moving slowly towards Oswin. "Do you think it is necessary to do this to her? Do you think it was easy for her know that you had died? _How_ you had died? What you left behind? She always used to tell me, how sad and terrified you all felt to leave your loved ones behind and face such cruel deaths. She had to live all your lives, dying and dying again in her sleep. She has _never_ recovered from the time steam, and probably never will. But she is strong even in her pain, even in the darkest hour. Even _she_ has lived her fair share of deaths."

Oswin's hand resting on the wall turned into a trembling fist.

"Does she _need_ to feel any more pain?" Tears rolled down the girl's face as the Doctor continued speaking, trying to make her see. Trying to get her to think; to change her mind. "I know. I'm sorry I did this to you, Oswin. To all of you. You sacrificed your life for me and I didn't appreciate that act enough. I apologise. This is a debt I owe to all of you, including _you_ _,_ Oswin."

The Doctor could notice the light glaze in the girl's eyes. "How can I know that you're saying the truth? That you're really appreciative?" The Doctor tried to take a step closer towards the girl.

The latter got shocked, gasped and took a step back. "Don't come next to me." She hissed. The time lord stopped immediately.

"OK... OK. Sorry." He sighed. "Emotions can never be proved... So I can't prove them to you. All I need you to do is to believe in me, as I believe that Clara's echoes have tried their best to save me and let me run unscathed as you faced your deaths." Oswin couldn't stop trembling as she felt her knees weakening. "I just need you... Think... To see." The Doctor tried to approach her once again, and this time, the feet of his human companion was pinned to the floor. "I am saying the truth." The Doctor took her hand in both his palms, warming it, providing comfort to both Clara's consiousness, and Oswin. "Please." He breathed, looking into her eyes mercily. He would do anything to bring Clara back, but every word he said to Oswin, he meant it.

The girl's eyes streamed tears of sadness.

 _Maybe it was time to let go._

"You're right. I'm sorry... _I_ was too selfish. Clara's hurt and I..." Oswin sobbed. The Doctor started walking towards her slowly. This time, Oswin couldn't care less. He finally reached her and went to hug her lovingly. "It's OK. It's normal to feel like that sometimes. After all, it's my fault I abandoned you all. And you're right. You have to be remembered, Oswin Oswald. I swear. I will remember you all." She pulled away. The Doctor continued. "And I'm so so sor-"

The girl soon stopped the time lord. "Hush. Now you wouldn't want Clara to feel any more pain, ay?" Said Oswin with broken eyes.

The Doctor smiled. "Thank you Oswin. For everything."

"No. Thank _you_ Doctor." The echo said as her arms curled once again around his neck, face buried in his shoulder.

 _He had never felt so close to Oswin, both physically and psychologically. His hand stroking the cold dalekanium metal, she was a human too strong to be reformed, being able to repress the anger thay had injected into her. Now he was stroking flesh, he was seeing_ real _tears. They were Oswin's, not quite Clara's. He knew she was the echo of someone he cared for so very deeply. He was ready to respect her and her fellow echoes. He didn't respect them enough. They deserve more than that. And Oswin had the courage to confront him, even if it meant hurting Clara. That's what the feeling of pain from hurting makes anyone do... But Oswin, she finally saw goodness. All the bitterness had faded away, to revealed a scared soul. Oswin... A good dalek. No... She wasn't a dalek... She was-_

The girl slumped against the Doctor, exploding in a heap of sobs he knew all to well.

"Hey, hey Clara. You're with me again." The Doctor said as he tried to hold her up. "It's over. You're with me." He kissed her hair.

"My ankle hurts." She mumbled almost intellegibly though the crying against his tee. The Doctor pulled her away, revealing her large glazed eyes.

"It's OK, Clara. You'll be better in a jiffy." He hushed her to calm his panicked companion.

"I'm s-." She cried, but the time lord stopped her from saying anything else.

"Don't say anything. You don't have to. Sleep. I'll take you to medbay, and back to bed." The Doctor told her in the most gentle purr.

He pulled her away gazing into her large eyes. The Doctor smiled a sad smile and she choked in a sob. He heaved her up as gently as possible, Clara whimpering slightly before holding on to the Doctor as if he was her life ring.

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 ** _A/N: hope you enjoyed it! Feedback is the motivation for every writer, so please, don't be shy to leave any constructive criticism or such!_**


	7. Marionettes

_**A/N: Another chapter! Hope you're all well!**_

 _ **Enjoy the 7th chapter of the Doctor's Associate!**_

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Missy came springing into medbay, holding a bitten apple. " _Ohhh..._ _What_ did I just miss?" She squealed with mouth half full. Clara was still trembling and double breathing, laying on the bed nearest to the medbay tool station (the second bed from the door), her back propped up. The Doctor was opposite to his companion, collecting the things he needed to heal her.

The time lord did not take cause of the Mistress and so the latter crossed the room and sat down on the bed closest to Clara, back propped up and legs crossed. Missy noted the slightly inflated blue-lilac ankle having an towel-wrapped ice pack on it. The Doctor had cut the thick tights Clara was wearing to reveal the injury. The female gallifreyan turned to the companion. "Tut tut... That's a horrible ankle you've got there. What happened to you dear?" Clara's glance shot towards Missy. She looked so petrified, still trembling, with her massive flared eyes brimming with tears. "Or was it when I helped you into the sewer?" The time lady winked, and Clara tried even harder not to explode into a heap of sobs.

But the Doctor soon saved Clara from the conversation. "Don't talk to her Missy. You've already done enough damage." After all, if it hadn't been for the Master, Clara wouldn't have suffered all of that pain.

Missy placed her hands up in surrender, before returning back to munch her apple. Clara shut her eyes, feeling a tear make its way down her already tear-laced cheeks. She felt like a small child, just like after she had seen her first horror movie when she was little.

It was worse. She had lived too much for her tender age.

The Doctor turned and walked towards her, slightly calmer yet his eyes still showed the immense guilt which had taken over his hearts. He just wanted to close on himself; he wanted to turn his hearts into stone, so the Doctor wouldn't feel any more pain or emotions.

But Clara needed him. She was so vulnerable, his poor Clara. She didn't deserve any of this. She, who showed such mercy, kindness... His bright, shining companion. And yet, all that pain made her kinder, stronger...

Not without any help, though. He knew how loneliness during painful events was toxic. She had removed the anger he held inside him... He felt compelled to show her such kindness back. Not because he had to return the favour, but becuase she deserved it. Oh... She deserved more than he could ever give her.

The time lord stood in front of her injured ankle, before looking at her. She still had her eyes shut tightly so he paced nearer to her.

"Clara." She opened her eyes, seeing his face just a few centimeters from hers. He smoothed her hair. "I know it's going to hurt a bit, Clara. But I promise it will heal quicker." He repeated her name... He needed to do so. Even the mention of her name kept the gallifreyan sane.

He awaited her answer and she finally nodded. The Doctor went back near her ankle, still horribly anguished from that sight and let out a weak sigh as he begun the job his name reflected. He took off the cold ice pack surrounding Clara's ankle, with the girl trying her best to hold the sobs and squeals of pain. A crunch echoed through the room as Missy took yet another bite off the apple. "Oh, _this_ is going to be _fun_." She mumbled before letting out a soft giggle.

The Doctor turned to Missy. "If you're going to have the _time_ of your life seeing Clara in pain, then you'd better head off." The female time lord shrugged her shoulders before jumping off the bed and heading outside to the corridor, the heel tapping against the cold TARDIS floor dissolving into nothing after a few seconds.

"Thank you Doctor." Clara said when she finally had enough strength to breathe.

The Doctor didn't even look at her. "Stay still." He said as he opened the gauze. The time lord's tone was gentle, yet form, somehow enclosed in stone, one even Clara had to admit she was slightly scared of. It felt as if she had to take the blame, because she had let Missy wound her around her finger like a marionette.

No. The Doctor felt like _he_ was the marionette in Missy's hands. _He_ was going to kill his companion after all.

Clara's fingers curled around the blanket covering the bed. She held tight, her knuckles turning white, in hope to suppress the pain that was yet to come. The Doctor slowly wrapped Clara's badly injured ankle, with the companion relieving silent sobs, with more tears lacing her cheeks. Such gentleness he expressed whilst taking care of her injury. He made sure he was not wrapping it too tight, or make too much movement. It felt as if the anger was easing out, but his guilt only increased. The companion had noticed and was infinitely grateful.

When the time lord had finished wrapping up the ankle, he tied the ice pack to her ankle with a few extra turns of gauze.

The Doctor paced nearer to Clara. Her eyes were tightly shut, with tears still slipping down her cheeks, and her knuckles were white. It shattered the Doctor's hearts seeing such a sorry sight. "Clara." He called her as he took her cold hand and tried to open it. The companion opened her eyes, still double breathing. "I'm so so sorry. It's all my fault. I shouldn't-" his words were cut off by a gentle squeeze from Clara's hand. She had to stay strong, even if that was the only response she could give. She could barely speak from the trauma and pain, and for every shift done by her body, every joint screamed out for her. After all, she had been teleported by the Vortex Manipulator without her knowledge, hung upside down (and the way Missy had brought her down), pushed down a sewer, forced in a dalek... Amongst other things. Her whole body was bruised and cuts trickling blood; most of which had already formed a scab.

"How's the headache?" he asked, sorrowed.

"Bit better." Clara cut short before forcing a smile, the tracks of dried tears and broken look _heavily_ contradicting what she wanted the Doctor to know. Her head still throbbed steadily, but at least not as much as before Oswin's appearance. The latter had finally accepted her faith and returned to the back of Clara's mind. Yet it was scary; being inside one's body and not being able to control it. The companion could see everything, feel everything... Even Oswin's emotional pain. And she could do nothing because she was already drained of energy. So she wasn't going to win, no matter how hard Clara tried. But the Doctor never gave up on her. He would never do so. Even when he thought Clara was dead.

And now the companion needed rest, and a lot of it. But before, the Doctor felt the urge to clarify something. "Why didn't you tell me you continued having nightmares?" Clara bit her lip, choking on tears.

She sniffed, "I didn't want you to babysit me. I had to deal with this on my own, like I do on Earth. I can't burden you too."

"And I won't let you burden this alone. I made a promise I would take care you. I won't lose you again. I won't lose _you_ , Clara Oswald." The Doctor took her shaking hands. "I know I can't help you much. But I don't want you to be alone." The time lord sat down beside her, wrapping his arm around her shoulders, pulling her against him. He kissed her hair, still smelling faintly of vanilla.

"Thank you." The Doctor heard Clara breathe into his tee.

"Don't mention it." He purred softly, pulling her tighter, her ear pressed against his chest. She let out a shaky breath, and stayed so for a little while.

"I don't want to stay here Doctor." She mumbled. "Can we go to the library instead?"

The Doctor smiled sadly. "Sure, Clara." He pressed a wet kiss on her forehead. The Doctor soon heaved her up bridal style, her head resting on his chest, her arms wrapped weakly around his neck. As the time lord walked into the corridor to the library, he could feel Clara's heavy breathing, deep in thought yet just trying to clear her head from all the buzzing in her mind. She still kept on having faint flashes from her echoes; a colourful scarf, orange plains, weeping angels, her dearest mother, a tortured Doctor, screams... Her _own_ screams.

The time lord held her closer to his hearts. He was scared of letting her go; he hated endings. Hearing her whimper periodically as she felt shocks of pain; some times in her ankle and other times her head as after each flash of memory, it was placed to its rightful area of her brain.

He could hardly speak, yet, he didn't want to talk to her telepathically. It would only increase the pain. He pressed his lips to her hair. "I'm here, Clara." He breathed into her hair. "It's going to be OK. I promise, I deeply promise."

He continued hearing her whimpers helplessly as they travelled to the Library.

* * *

 ** _A/N: Hope you enjoyed it! Feedback is every writer's extra motivation to write and publish; don't hesitate to leave a comment... Even constructive criticism!_**


	8. 101 Places to See

After the tiring journey through the TARDIS, they finally arrived to their destination. On entering the library, he laid her on the chaise lounge facing the burning fireplace, checked the cold pack on her foot before placing a soft fleece blanket on her. The Doctor stayed on his knees, inspecting Clara closely. The girl had her eyes closed, sometimes hitching breaths as painful memories resurfaced. He felt so useless... He... The Doctor, the Oncoming Storm, the Saver of Worlds; as one of Clara's echo had referred to him, was unable to care to the person most precious to him. Her breathing pattern soon flattened out, before opening her eyes. She was staring blankly at the fireplace, but as soon as she felt the Doctor smoothe her cheek, she looked at him, with her eyes so desperately inflated. The companion dived under the blankets with despair, closing her eyes with heartbreak. "Oh Clara." The Doctor exclaimed before pressing a soft kiss. "You don't deserve this. You've done _nothing_ to deserve it."

He continued smoothing her hair, and it was only after quite a while that the Doctor decided to ask her what he wanted to tell his companion since medbay.

"I know I'm bombarding you with questions, Clara. But I _need_ to know." He said as his fingers passed through her short hair. She nodded at him, her lips pursed. The Doctor traced the girl's hairline with his finger tips. "The sewers." He simply said. Clara bit her her bottom lip, closing her eyes, wanting to avoid eye contact at all costs. " "How did you get in?" The girl thought for a while... How it would be best to tell him. She sighed, opening her eyes, and opened her mouth to speak, but no words came out. And she was too horrified with the replay of events in her head to start crying. The Doctor cupped his hand on her cheek, his index finger touching her temple. He moved slowly towards her, pressing his lips in her hair, before taking a deep breath to bring in her sweet vanilla souffle scent.

That was when all the memories came rushing in.

 _"How much of a drop do you say that is? Can you see the_ bottom _?" Missy said. The Doctor could sense, through Clara, a black foul-smelling pit._

 _"Too dark." The girl replied truthfully_ _, looking at the void beneath her_ _. "We can chug a stone down or somethin'_ _..._ _"_

 _"Oh yeah, good idea." The time lady said, before Clara felt the palm of Missy's hand pushing against her back. Clara tripped, and shouted as she fell into what felt like a bottomless pit. It felt like an eternity, almost like the time stream with less pain and the main difference being blacking out once Clara hit against the hard damp ground._

The Doctor pulled away, leaving a kiss. But his eyes opened wide in horror. "Missy pushed you into the sewer?" The time lord breathed to her disbelievingly. The companion's eyes inflated, biting her bottom lip as she desperately tried to hold back the tears. "Oh I'm so so sorry, Clara." He pulled her towards him, the girl burring her nose into the Doctor's chest. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry." He kept on breathing in Clara's hair before he pulled her away. The girl never opened her eyes, just breathing deeply to take in the Doctor's scent. That was the only thing which would calm her at that moment; not even the Doctor's anxious heartbeat. Another throbbing in her head aroused, to which the girl whimpered and knitted her eyebrows. The Doctor never stopped smoothing her forehead, but he had to find another way to calm her down. But he was determined... He won't drown her to sleep unless he couldn't help it. Yet, he encouraged her to do so himself... "You should sleep, Clara. I'm sure you'll feel better." The girl's fingers curled tighter around his tee. But she couldn't hold the Doctor near her all the time as if he was a Teddy bear. She had to let go someday. And so, her hold lost its strength, before she pulled away and nodded. She leaved back, her head in the pillows whilst the time lord tucked her in. She was trying as hard as possible to fall into oblivion as she closed her eyes. He pressed a kiss to her hairline. "If there is anything you need, just ask the TARDIS." She wanted to argue with the Doctor, that the machine hated her, and the old cow would never call him. But she didn't have the strength to fight back... She didn't want to argue, either. So Clara just accepted her faith.

"Are you sure you want to stay alone?" The time lord asked.

Clara nodded, swallowing thickly. She wanted to prove how capable she was of facing her emotions alone.

As the Doctor sensed a calm atmosphere, he decided to leave her be.

"Night, Clara." He sat up, and reluctantly walked to the library door. Just before he closed it behind him, he peaked. Clara seemed peaceful; fit to sleep. He closed the door as silently as possible. Yet, just as he was going to take the first step away from his companion, , the TARDIS shrilled telepathically.

 _Listen, Doctor._ She said.

"What?" The time Lord replied. She could hear her thief was upset.

 _Place your ear against the door._

He did as he was told. His jaw dropped when he heard the unmistakable sound of his companion's muffled sobs. The Doctor didn't think twice to open the door without knocking beforehand. Her hands were covering her eyes, beads of sweat easily visible on her face. "Clara" the Doctor breathed.

She jumped, taking off her hands from in front of her eyes, looking anxious, and scared.

"What happened?" He asked.

"I'm fine... I'm-I'm fine." She stuttered, but her look proved otherwise.

But the time Lord felt the urge to continue asking her. "Please... Tell me, Clara. I won't harm you. There's nothing wrong to tell me what's happening." She shook her head.

"You have lives of torment in your head, Clara. It's OK if you don't feel fine." His hands held hers, trying her best to make her feel comfortable and to let her know that she was never alone.

"I can't sleep, Doctor. Not with all the stuff that's happened. And I can't spend one moment without thinking about them." The Doctor kneeled near her once again, not knowing what to do to help her or ease the pain. It was all his fault... And he felt totally useless. She sighed. "I have to be stronger. I know I can defeat this on my own. I have to. I have a life on Earth and there, I must face them alone." Clara looked at her trembling hands to avoid eye contact. "I'm sorry, Doctor. I've disappointed you."

His eyebrows knitted in confusion. "Disappointed? Clara, you are one of the bravest people I have ever met. But no human has ever lived with thousands of different foreign memories and lives. And you can't do this alone. You need medical help, emotional support... All of that stuff whenever they crop up again." He saw the distraught look she had." Clara, this has never been done. No one can handle what life throws at the person alone. Not everything. Especially things like these. You should _never_ do this alone. Understood?"

She nodded, her lips pursed, threatening not to burst into sobs. She was surprised how, after all those tears which were she'd, she still had more to spare. Guess her body had adapted for these kind of sleepless, distressing nights.

"Now... About sleeping..." He could only think of one way to calm her down. "Do you want me to put you to sleep?" His voice had decreased to a whisper. _That was the only way_ _I_ _could help her,_ he thought.

Clara's eyes shot open, shaking her head. "No no please no..." She kept on chanting. _The companion had slipped into panic mode again._

So the Doctor scooped her back and held her ear close to his heartbeat, making sure she was feeling warm and comfortable in the sound of his hearts. "OK OK. I won't do it, don't worry. I won't do it."

He felt Clara breathe one sentence, the Doctor feeling the warm breath through his shirt. "Thank you." In return, he hugged her closer, hoping his aura would at least comfort her.

At one point, the Doctor felt that she was hesitating. "Doctor?" He pulled back.

"Yes, Clara?" He replied as the time lord tucked a few strands of hair behind her ear.

She bit her bottom lip. "Can you read me a book?" She couldn't look into his eyes. She felt as dependent and as childish as a five-year-old child, and it felt embarrassing. And she hated it. "I just need something to take my mind off all of these echoes for a moment. I... I need to sleep well."

She was soon pulled out of her cave of torment and loss when she felt the Doctor's palm smooth her cheek before kissing her hair. "There's no need to be embarrassed, Clara." She gazed at him with her beaded ocean eyes. He knew she was still broken after being trapped inside a dalek, before yet being trapped inside her own body and being controlled by an angry, remorseful echo. At least, Oswin was sorted back to its place, the back of Clara's mind. Reminded, but the anger and regret never lived.

And so, the headache had subsided a little, too.

The Doctor had immediately noticed that she genuinely looked lost, as if her mind was not fighting back anymore and was lost in her own world; immersed in it, rather.

She threw herself on the Doctor, her arms wrapped around his neck, clinging to him like a life ring in the middle of the ocean. Clara could feel him, melt around her, giving her the comfort she needed. After a while, the girl untangled herself from the Doctor, who pulled away from his companion to look into her large inflated eyes. He gently cupped both his palms to the girl's cheekbones. "I will be here as long as you need me to be." He purred, but he only received a weak sniffle as a reply. His lips turned into a soft comforting smile, "Your large, sweet inflated eyes." He said, as the time lord wiped her tears from her cheeks. The time Lord had grown to love those large brown orbs of hers. At this moment, they looked more beautiful than ever; even through her brokenness.

Clara's lips curled into a feeble smile. "That's my Clara." As the Doctor's grin widened, before he pulled her into another soft hug. He felt her nuzzle her nose into his shirt, feeling safe being enveloped into her friend's aura. They finally broke the hug again. "Want a story?" The Doctor asked. Clara nodded with a faint smile which made her beady eyes glisten in happiness. She felt consoled that the Doctor would understand and take care of her when she most needed; when she was sure she wasn't going to make it out alone. And so the time lord's lips curled in a grin, before sitting up and heading off in between the humongous shelves; scanning those nearby for a book whilst his friend laying on the lounge, looking at him, thanking her lucky stars that the Universe (well... Missy) enabled Clara to meet the Doctor - her Doctor, the time lord with the Scottish accent and scruffy silver coloured hair.

He just as he pulled out a book from the shelf (which was Tales of Two Cities), the TARDIS materialised a book in its place. He felt his hearts break.

101 Places To See.

 _Clara needs to calm down, Doctor._ The time machine said telepathically _. I'm sure this is useful._

The Doctor nodded in thanks, unable to say anything verbally due to the knot in his throat. He delicately pulled out the childhood book before placing the classic back in its rightful place.

He walked towards Clara, the small taps of his shoes accompanying the sound of the crackling fire. His companion still looked at the red-orange tongues dancing in the fireplace. The time lord walked towards chair near the fireplace. It creaked as he picked it up, and that was when Clara was pulled out of her stasis. "No Doctor." He stopped immediately, still heaving the chair. The girl's eyes were still the large orbs he had seen earlier. They were pleading him to stay near her.

Physically.

"Please." She breathed.

The Doctor nodded, left the chair in its rightful place and sat at the edge of the chaise lounge. Clara tried to move to the side to make more space for him, but the Doctor soon stopped her by placing his palm over her shoulder. He laid near her with his legs resting on the lounge.

The time lord wrapped his arm around Clara. She felt her tense body melt against him, their sides fitting like jigsaw puzzles together. And he didn't feet tense, either.

He showed her the book. "Do want me to read this?" He purred. The Doctor looked at her. Tears occluded her vision. Nonetheless, the companion nodded, snuggling closer to the Doctor.

The latter opened the book.

The Leaf was the first thing that came into view. Looking at Clara, she let tears fall, wrapping her fingers tighter around his shirt. "Are you sure you don't want to read you something else?" He asked gently as he wiped the tears with his thumb. The girl shook her head.

So, the time lord turned the page over cleared his throat. On the second page, there was a picture of the sea and fish and sharks and seahorses and corals.

 _The first place I want to see_

 _Is the large and beautiful deep, blue, sea;_

 _With all its creatures having different colours_

 _Oh, so many things this vast range covers_

He had taken her to the sea once, when he wore his previous face. The TARDIS force field had let them exit the time machine without getting soaked. Clara was mesmerised with the beauty.

They both gazed at the page on the right.

There was a drawing of mountains having snow-covered caps.

And so the Doctor continued.

 _The mountains; high up in the sky,_

 _Their pinnacle, soft and white; desire to fly._

 _The world one can see, beneath their feet._

 _As they stand upon the ice; a white sheet._

He turned over the page delicately. The Doctor did not continue reading, but looked over to his Clara, cheeks red with warmth, eyes and mind closed to the world, as her slow, smooth breathing suggested.

The Doctor continued flipping silently through the book. Indeed, the Doctor had already, unknowingly, taken her to most of these places. They had visited caves (they almost got lost in one on Andromea), forests (he shivered at the memory of the forest which had grown overnight... He almost thought he'd lose her together with the rest of humanity), waterfalls (they found a waterfall made with mineralised water which looked like it literally had glitters; they were in fact little pieces of eroded mineral rock), the River Thames (they had gone not only to visit it, but he had taken her to the Frost Fair... She was so beautiful - still is, mind you - but at that point, his big old face had started to fall for her again, even if she was dating Danny at the time. He had fallen in the hands of Love and there was no escape from him).

He finally arrived to page 11

 _I want to stand upon the clouds,_

 _Seeing the world from above that the cloud enshrouds_

 _Like a bird I shall spread my wings wide;_

 _Feeling alive as I show my pride._

The cloud... He had lost her - one of the echoes - when he wore his other face. Clara Oswin Oswald. He remembers how his hearts had stopped when she and the ice governess had reached the edge of the cloud, when he had seen her fall like a meteorite towards earth: a fallen star, like in that film... _Stardust_. Except... She didn't wake up after the fall; not on her own. She was only able to stay alive by Strax's ressurection device; long enough to do her job, long enough to keep the Doctor safe and cry in such pain and fear, that the being which had taken over Dr Simmeon's body would melt. Hadn't it been for her, the Doctor's life would have ended. Hadn't it been for Clara, the whole of humanity would have ceased to exist as the Doctor would have done nothing to stop the snowmen. He remembered how laborious her breath was as she breathed those final words.

It was _then_ he had decided to start searching for the girl twice dead.

And now she was in his arms; he never knew she would turn out to be so lovely, so exquisitely beautiful... And so strong in her fragility.

He glanced at page 12... But his vision was blurring as he felt sleepier and sleepier. The Doctor could sense her warmth enveloping him, both of the fireplace and the tender form of his companion wrapped in the blanket cuddled against him. He tried his best to stay awake, feeling his grip on the book slowly slip away as he entered a world of his own.

* * *

 _ **A/N: Hope you all enjoyed this chapter! Will update asap! Feedback appreciated as always! Till next time, take care!**_


	9. Becoming a Hybrid

"Doctahhhh!" A squeal came from the corridor which made the him jump out of his sleep. Missy entered, hopping into the Library. The Doctor shushed his fellow time lord before gazing at Clara, making sure his little human was still in the deepest of sleeps.

"Oh, so the puppy's asleep again." Missy said, before twisting the lollipop in her mouth. Its blackcurrant scent radiated to a relative distance away from her, almost reaching the Doctor. The time lord shushed his friend (or enemy) in the most silent way possible as his companion, his sweet human, stirred in his arms. "It's alright Clara. Back to sleep." He hummed. The human relaxed and was soon resting peacefully once again.

The Doctor checked that the Leaf was still held as page 1 without letting Missy know it ever existed, just in case it had slipped whilst he was sleeping. He hoped Missy didn't know anything about it (which was quite hard, because it seemed she had thoroughly researched about her. He stroked the Leaf's midrib, barely touching it with his fingertips. It was the Leaf that brought her back to him on Trenzalore, when she was almost losing herself, her head a jumble of live and deaths, some of which still had to be lived in the future, from Earth's perspective. Soon after, he closed the book with utmost delicacy, as if the book was sacred and left unstirred as possible. For it carried the soul and life of his dearest companion.

Missy's high heels echoed across the immense library as she walked to Clara's side of the lounge. She cocked her head as she inspected the girl. "She's a cuter puppy when she's asleep." Missy sighed. "I guess I did choose well. I chose the right control freak for you, didn't I, Doctor?" The Missy's heels tapped against the hard floor again before sitting down on the lounge nearest to her fellow time lord, still twisting the lollipop in her mouth.

The Doctor gazed at his amazing companion. Asleep, at peace.

She was a control freak, but yet, she was _his_ control freak.

"I see she became just like you." Said Missy as she pointed the lollipop at Clara. "Reckless, inquisitive, and ever so slightly Scottish." She chuckled. But the Doctor kept on looking over his companion, smoothing her soft hair, lulling her to gentle dreams without violence, fear and death.

Yes... Yes she became just like him.

Or did he become too much like her?

No. They've both changed, to adapt to each other.

Yes... She became just like himself. And that was what scared him.

Clara, becoming too reckless.

Clara being too overconfident and do things only he should consider doing.

The Doctor was scared that one day he would see that peaceful face of hers one last time; at her death, and if that would happen, he would never forgive himself.

For he made a promise, he had a duty.

Of care.

"You shouldn't have given her my number, Missy." He breathed, as the Doctor let his fingers pass through her silky hair.

"Why not?" Missy asked, outraged. "I just wanted to help. I found the perfect girl for you, a perfect companion. You're happy with her, what do you want?" She sucked the candy once again.

"She'll die on me, Missy... Some way or another she will." The Doctor choked.

Missy pulled out the lollipop from between her lips. "It's not like it's inevitable, luv." Waving her lollipop as she reasoned out. "It happened to every single one of your petty humans."

"But not her, Missy. Not her." He breathed. His sweet little Clara. He couldn't bare of standing over her grave, or worse even, seeing her life pour out of her body until there would be nothing left but the reminiscent of Clara Oswald; a shell.

The time lady rolled her eyes. "If you're going to continue to squabble about the human I presented you with, then I'm off."

The Doctor didn't take cause of her as she strolled off; hopping, humming, and rolling the lollipop in her mouth. He just spent the rest of his time looking at Clara, her smooth skin lit up orange by the raging fire. He let his fingertips trace over her unblemished forehead, hoping that her mind would be cleared, by now. Cleared from all the suffering... The pain... The bad dreams.

And so, in such an air of peace, he let himself drift off into a world of sleep once again, cuddling Clara Oswald to him.

* * *

Clara shot up, hyper ventilating, looking blankly at the raging fireplace as she replayed the dreadful moments she had just dreamt. "Clara," she heard from behind as two hands locked around each of her shoulders. "Look at me, Clara." But she didn't listen. "Clara." He purred, before cupping his palms to her cheeks. The Doctor turned her head to him in the most gentle manner, her eyes still wild, her breathing staggered. "It's OK, Clara. Just breathe." He began to breathe in and out deeply, and Clara soon followed his lead. "That's it. That's it." He encouraged her as the girl slowly calmed down. "You clever Clara." He breathed as the Doctor brushed his thumbs to her wet cheekbone. "You're safe in the TARDIS, ok?" The companion could do nothing but nod feebly. The Doctor pressed a soft kiss to Clara's forehead. "You're OK." He breathed as he pulled away before letting his hands slip from her cheeks and take hers. "Was it an echo?" He asked. Clara shook her head, having her large inflated doe eyes filled with tears.

"It's... It's nothing, Doctor." She tried to shake him off.

"Clara." He sung her name. "I don't want to know that you're keeping something which you need to talk about. You know I'm here for you, whatever happens." She nodded before bursting into heap of sobs. The Doctor pulled her closer towards him, letting her rest her head on his chest, knowing that she wanted to hear the sound of his hearts. The time lord knew she loved that sound; focusing on the rhythmic beats of his twin anatomic pumps. The crying soon died down, but Clara didn't move.

And neither did the Doctor. He continued smoothing her hair, radiating the weak smell of vanilla.

"When I was in the Dalek," Clara began. "Even before, you never gave up, even when I disintegrated by the daleks." Her palm curled around his shirt, holding it in her grasp. "You never gave up hope." Only the sound of the crackling fire broke the silence which enclosed them. Finally the companion was able to breathe. "Why?"

The Doctor continued stroking Clara's hair, still drowned in thought, before replying, "You are my... My friend, Clara. You were the first face my regeneration saw. How can I not take care of you?" Clara continued to listen as the Doctor found it hard to express himself to her. "You mean more to me than you know, Clara. That's why I have a duty of care. Because I care for you... You're... You're my best friend and I feel it's my job to get you out of trouble."

"I know I might feel like your best friend, so why did you give the Confession Dial to Missy?" She croaked.

"Had I given it to you, would you have known what to do with it?" The girl bit her lip. "You would just start worrying about me, no matter how many times I would ask you not to."

"I could say the same to you, daft old man." Clara chuckled uneasily. Silence fell between the two, only periodically broken by the crackles from the raging fire. The companion wasunable to look at the Doctor. She was guilt-stricken as she had doubted him, and it felt as if she was egoistic. "I'm sorry, Doctor... It's just that Missy and everything..." The Doctor shushed her delicately.

"I understand Clara." He said. How could she have hurt him so many times and still be able to treat her as if nothing had happened? As if she hadn't betray him that day he had called after Danny's death? "Missy's the most unlikely person to trust. But I still have hope."

The girl nodded before she talked to the Doctor. "But please, at least protect me from her. I don't want this to happen again. It's been far too scary." Clara said as she was pulled in a tender hug by the Doctor, before pulling away and putting his palm splayed across his chest.

"I solemnly swear." He said, his lips quivering as he held a burst of laughter.

Clara's eyebrows arched. "You've been reading too much Harry Potter, haven't you?"

The time lord chuckled. "Nothing much to do when I'm alone. I reread them a few times, actually."

Clara snug closer into the Doctor's heat. "I thought you didn't like fiction."

"Not much nonfiction are written these days, teach." He looked at her. "You should start writing a book." Clara looked up. The Doctor continued. "Like... An autobiography or something." _I would definitely read it a billion times over._

Clara replied, with one eyebrow arched. "Write on what? On how many times we get chased by daleks or Cybermen? People would think it's fiction." Her smile faded slightly. "I would have never imagined such an amazing life, Doctor. Not even my childhood imagination, running around with my mum's book would have lead me close to nowadays." She cuddled to the Doctor once again. "I don't deserve you." She breathed. The time lord felt such a passion in his hearts, such unexplainable warmth. He slowly lowered down, and pressed his wet lips to Clara's hair. They spent quite a while so, before the Doctor pulled back from the sweet kiss. _I am the one who doesn't deserve you, Clara._

The companion's thin fingers curled around the Doctor's shirt, holding it, embracing the fact that she could live without him no longer. And it seemed he felt the same as his arms curled tighter around her in a warm, emotionally infinite embrace.

 _I'm so sick of losing, Clara. I can't lose you_ _too_ _._

"My Clara." He breathed as the Doctor let his fingers pass through her hair. "I always lead you into trouble."

"You don't have to worry about trouble, daft old man." He heard her chuckle. "You're not the one leading me into it. So stop worrying." She hummed as he let his fingers trace her hairline, making sure he remembered every detail from Clara. For when she's gone.

But for now, she was with him. She was safe.

"How's that stubborn head of yours huh?" He asked her before feeling his lips curl into a smirk.

She punched him in the chest; a playful gesture. "Oy, I heard that, you know?" She said, her eyebrows knitted comically.

The Doctor laughed heartily. He felt all his anxiousness melt.

"A thousand times better." She said with a genuine smile. The spark had returned in her eyes, her smile bright and wide. She still had heavy, darkened bags under her eyes. But she was well into her road towards full recovery. Clara curled further into his embrace. "Thanks for asking."

Though the silence, an earthquake erupted from her belly.

"Doctor?" Clara broke the sound of the crackling fire.

"Yes, Clara?" He purred, almost chuckling.

"Can we go get something to eat? I'm kinda famished." The Doctor's thin lips curled into a delicate smile, before they were once again pressed against Clara's hair.

"Of course." He purred. "What can I get you?"

"Is the stash of sushi we got from 10th century China still there?"

"Yeah." He said as the Doctor started to uncurl his arms.

"The TARDIS does make miracles!" Clara chuckled, and the Doctor couldn't hold a laugh either.

"I'll go and get it for you." Said the Doctor, but the companion soon grabbed his wrist.

"I'm coming with you to the kitchen, whether you like it or not." The time lord hesitated. Her eyebrows arched; a method's she always uses with her students...

The Doctor sighed. Once Clara had set her mind to something, nothing and no one could be able to make her do otherwise. "Fine. But be careful." Clara rolled her eyes as she carefully took off the soft blanket off her.

"It's only walking to the kitchen, Doctor. It's not like we're under attack or something." She slowly turned, grinding her teeth together in the process, suppressing the minute pain in her whole body. The Doctor was plunged deep in thought.

 _Clara_ _..._ His _Clara had been vulnerable when under attack. She_ _was in the middle of the hungriest creatures in the Universe, and he couldn't save her. She was so afraid, he could see her hands trembling when the Doctor saw the Dalek eyestalks turning towards her from the small monitor in Davros' infirmary._

 _He couldn't save her._

 _He couldn't-_

The Doctor soon felt fingers intertwining with his, pulling him out from the beating. "Doctor." He heard Clara's sweet voice. She was sitting on the lounge in front of him, her eyes large in pity and worry. "I'm here, Doctor. I'm fine." The Doctor took a few seconds staring at his companion to focus on what she was saying. Clara eagerly awaited a reply, stroking the back of his hand tenderly.

"Um..." The Doctor soon came to his senses. "I'm sorry, Clara. I'm..."

The companion stopped the Gallifreyan. "It's OK. No need to apologise." Her tender red lips formed into a smile, and so did the Doctor's. "So," Clara said. "Still going for sushi?"

"'Course" the Doctor remarked. Clara's grip on the time lord's hand loosened as he walked a few steps where the crutches were leaning to the bookshelf. "The TARDIS placed them there for you." The Doctor said as he handed one to Clara.

She laughed. "She's starting to be a real sweetheart."

The Doctor's attack eyebrows knitted. "She's always been a good girl!" He scorned as he gave her the second crutch.

"Not with me she wasn't. Remember when she used to hide my bedroom or turn the bathroom water to extremely cold?"

The Doctor thought for a while. "Fair enough."

"Gotcha." Clara breathe a laugh, then shakily started getting on her good leg with help from both the crutches and the Doctor. But she was soon going to slip before making the first step before regaining stability.

"Easy, easy." The Doctor reassured her. Clara nodded, and her friend stepped a small step backward, leaving her walk alone whilst still keeping watch. She was soon able to get the hang of it, and was soon near the closed door of the library. "Oh," said the Doctor. "Sorry Clara." He ran to the lounge and took the two fluffiest pillows he could find before running back to the door. "We'll be needing these."

"Actually, Doctor. Can I first go take a wash? I feel horrible." Said Clara. "You can go and start eating. I'm sure I'll be able to manage on my own." The Doctor shook his head.

"Not leaving you alone... Especially when Missy's still around." Clara rolled her eyes. "I'm sorry, Clara. Just for now." He apologised.

"Yeah, yeah, sure." She said truthfully. The time lord opened the door for his companion and the two continued walking down the corridor.

* * *

 ** _A/N: hope you enjoyed this chapter! Feedback is what keeps me going! So anything is greatly appreciated (no flames though please)_**


	10. The Doctor's Girl

The Doctor patiently waited his companion outside the bathroom. The latter had walked slowly through the corridor as she took small baby steps. The Doctor would have wanted to heave her and relieve her of the pain, but she wanted to do it on her own.

 _His sweet brave Clara..._

 _"Take your time." He had said, his hand cupping her cheekbone,_ _hi_ _s thumb stroking her beautiful_ _immaculate skin_ _._ _"The TARDIS locked the medbay just here,_ _so I'll treat your ankle again, just to make sure it heals as soon as possible."_

 _Clara nodded, blushing ever so slightly. "Thanks Doctor."_

 _"_ _I'll be waiting outside if you need anything, OK?"_ _He said. The companion'_ _s reply involved nothing more than a weak sad smile before the Doctor pressed a sweet kiss to her forehead, turned and closed the door behind him._

He could hear the running water in the bath. He could just imagine the water making its way down her petite frame, her pale skin bubbling with fruity body soaps, her hair lathered with lavander or strawberry or vanilla or any other scented shampoo, letting the physical reminents of Skaro descend into the drain as the water continued flowing freely.

He thought she was... No... She _actually_ was the most perfect, immaculate creation of the Universe. And yes... She was broken- they had broken her so many times and it was his fault; but that made her even more beautiful, more resilient.

The Doctor soon heard the water flow stop. He turned alert, sitting up from the floor.

 _Never give up, never give in._ That was his mantra during the days he had broken the promise. But... It seemed that she had taken it as her life motto. It was almost scary how similar she had become to him. He had already told her to take her time traveling life slow. She would always say "Yes" or nod.

 _"I'll be careful, Doctor." She chuckled, walking towards him as she noticed his broken hearts. "Don't you worry. I'll be fine."_

 _The Doctor would see her smile, so perfect, and feel his hearts shatter when he remembered there will be a time where that smile would vanish. He'd sigh. "Oh, Clara... My sweet Clara." His finger could trail her cheekbone. "I don't want to lose you."_

 _She would simply peck his cheek. "I'll be fine, daft old man. I-"_

He heard the bathroom door open, revealing, apart from the fog and moisture, a feeble form, looking downwards in shame for being so dependent from behind the ajar door. She was wearing a casual black T-shirt having "Keep Calm and Time Travel" printed on it and black yoga pants, the side of the twisted ankle rolled up slightly higher. It was still inflated and discoloured, but at least it looked better than from how it had been a few hours earlier and she could stand up on it for just a split second before it hurt too bad.

He heaved her to medbay in bridal style, ignoring her protests to try and walk herself, before placing her at the edge of one of the beds, still sitting upright. He took a tube of alien rapid healing cream and a clean sterile gauze. "Is it still hurting you?" said the Doctor as he bend down to reach her ankle.

"A bit... Not as much as it was though." she replied. He nodded. The time lord squeezed out some cream onto his fingers from its bigger-on-the-inside tube and slowly massaged it onto her ankle. Clara hissed as soon as she felt the cold gel, wrapping her fingers tightly to the edge of the bed. She was biting her bottom lip as she held her eyes closed.

"Alright?" The Doctor asked, looking up at her. Her eyes opened.

"Yeah, yeah just cold." She breathed, as the girl tried to hide the real cause of her hiss.

The Doctor's eyebrow arched. "And ever so slightly in pain." She breathed, closing her eyes again in surrender.

The time lord knew her too well by now.

"It'll soon be over, OK?" said the time lord as he let his hand rest on the knee of her better foot. Her eyes opened to him, seeing his worried expression. He didn't want her to feel any more pain. She didn't deserve to feel pain in any circumstance.

"Nothing I can't handle." She breathed a laugh nervously, hunched forward and gripping the sheets tighter.

He smiled. She was always brave, his Clara. And so, he continued to spread the cream evenly over the ankle, and soon turned to wrapping it with a gauze before finishing with a supportive brace. "This should do." He said as the Doctor stood up. "How are you feeling?"

"Slightly in pain." She responded.

"I'll give you some meds with the sushi. Should minimise the pain for quite a bit." He replied as the time lord has her back towards her, placing the meds in their rightful place.

"Thank you, Doctor." Clara replied with a smile on her face, her cheeks slightly blushing. "For everything." She continued.

He stopped rummaging in the cupboards, turning his face a little towards her. "Don't mention it." He replied, also slightly embarrassed before continuing. The companion's stomach growled, which broke the embarrassed atmosphere, and both the Doctor and his Clara started laughing.

After they calmed down, the time lord walked towards her and said, "Let's take you to eat. Do you want me to heave you up or-?" She soon stopped him.

"I'll use the crutches... Try to strengthen myself."

The Doctor nodded. He brought the crutches (which the TARDIS had sent to the medbay from the bathroom) and curled his arm around Clara's waist, as the latter let her arm curl around his neck. The time Lord helped her sit up the high bed, wincing slightly as soon as the other foot touched the ground. "Sorry." Said the Doctor.

"It's fine. Don't worry." She replied, and took the crutches, slowly placing her hand in each one.

"Ready?" He said to her.

Clara nodded.

"Tell me if you get tired or the pain gets unbearable, OK?"

He looked worried, and so Clara's lips turned into a smile and said, not to worry him further, "Will do." He took one step towards her and pressed a sweet kiss to her forehead, smoothing her hair. The time lord moved aside and Clara was soon taking her first steps. The Doctor remembered he had left the cushions he had taken for Clara in the corridor and the TARDIS had most likely placed it in its rightful place. So he grabbed two of the soft pillows on the nearest bed and followed Clara attentively.

* * *

Clara was just a few feet away from the kitchen, she huffed and puffed as she started feeling weary supporting the weight of her feeble body with one foot and 2 crutches. The Doctor in front of her stopped, turning and looking at her worriedly. "Are you alright, Clara?" The Doctor said.

"Yeah yeah." She breathed. "Soon there I suppose, yeah?"

The Doctor nodded. "Let me help you."

She shook her head. "No need. I can do this."

The gallifreyan's lips curled into a sad smile, feeling proud of having such a strong willed companion. And so, Clara continued to walk on. Soon they arrived to the kitchen, to which the Doctor opened the door and led Clara in before closing it behind them.

"Oh hello dear." Said Missy as she saw the companion entering the kitchen. The latter rolled her eyes. "Good morning to you too." The time lady said sarcastically before retuning to her passion fruit yogurt. The Doctor pulled back a chair opposite to the female time lord and helped his companion sit down on it before taking away her crutches and placing them in a corner near the door. Then he pulled back a chair which separated the time lord and the Doctor's companion and placed the pillows. The time lord helped her elevate her injured leg onto the seat.

"Good?" The Doctor asked.

"Great." Clara smiled. The time lord paced to the freezer and took out 2 wooden boxes. He opened a drawer nearby and took out 2 pairs of chopsticks before placing everything on the table. The companion grabbed a box and a pair of chopsticks and opened the wax seal, looking hungrily at the variety of such fish rolls in the box. The Doctor soon handed her a small bowl of soy sauce before taking his box, sticks and soy sauce bowl to go and sit between Clara and Missy, opposite to the seat used to elevate Clara's ankle.

"Oh," said the Doctor. "Almost forgot to give you the pill." He sat up again, filled a glass with water, and handed it to Clara, before digging in his pocket to bring out a bottle of human pain killers, handing her one, the girl swallowing it right away with a few gulps of water. He placed the bottle back in his pocket and opened the box.

"Great, so you get the sushi and I get this... crap..." Missy placed half full cup on the table. "low fat passion fruit yogurt." She scoffed. Clara chuckled and so did the Doctor.

"There's always left over sushi in the freezer, if you want Missy." He said as he dipped the sushi roll into the soy sauce and took a bite.

"Doctor!" Clara gritted between her teeth.

"Relax, there's plenty still left." He replied, with the companion saying nothing in reply. The female time lord dragged her feet while she walked towards the freezer. She opened it and took out a smaller wooden box similar to Clara and the Doctor's. When she sat down, after taking a pair of chopsticks, she opened the box to find only two sushi rolls.

"Oh you've got to be kidding me." Clara and the Doctor chuckled. "What are you too laughing about?"

The time lord soon replied, "It's the TARDIS' doing, Missy, don't look at us."

She huffed and crossed her legs on the table. "Missy?" The Doctor asked with eyebrows arched. She stopped and gazed at him.

"What?" She asked. The Doctor gestured towards her legs. She sulked and slowly slid off her legs.

"So your puppy can put up her leg and I can't?" said Missy, scoffing yet again.

The time lady was provoking Clara and the latter felt it and felt infuriated. "I am _not_ a puppy Missy. More than can be said for you, you-"

"Hey hey. Let's just calm down for a minute. OK?" Thank goodness the Doctor was able to stop her from continuing. It's very difficult to stop his companion from her rant once she's angry; thank heavens that the Doctor was one of the only people that could control Clara' s temper (and she controlling his, to say the least). "Can we at least eat without having to fight?" He continued. Clara looked down in shame.

"Sorry." She mumbled. But the time lady said otherwise.

"The puppy started it." She breathed without making eye contact with either the Doctor or Clara.

"That's it, Doctor." Clara shouted as she banged the sushi box shut. "I'm going to eat in my room."

"And how are you arriving, since you have such a horrible leg, sweetie?" The time lady said as the companion locked the box and prepared to stand up, the gallifreyan. Having a wide smirk on her face.

But the Doctor held his 'best friend's' shoulder. "Clara, you're not going anywhere." He then turned to his archenemy, letting his attack eyebrow mode flourish. "Missy, shut up and eat the sushi roll if you're so hungry." She rolled her eyes and continued eating it. "You can go eat it somewhere else if you're so pissed."

Missy scoffed. "Me? Pissed? I'm never pissed, dear. It's your pet who's pissed off. I _have_ told you; you'd go to hell if she asked; you'd do absolutely _anything_ for her to please your girl." she smirked before walking away, still munching the sushi roll and taking the open box and chopsticks.

A silence locked the room. No one moved, no one breathed.

"Doctor..." Clara breathed.

He replied nothing. The time lord continued to play with his chopsticks, poking the sushi.

She let her fingers curl around his hand. He stopped poking the sushi roll and let her warmth soothe him. "Please Doctor..." He heard once again.

The Doctor turned to look at her. He looked as if he was going to cry.

"I don't want you to suffer because of me, OK?" The companion said. Her friend swallowed thickly.

"I don't care what you think; don't suffer." She continued, her eyebrows arched upwards.

After a few moments of silence, the Doctor nodded, his eyes brimming with tears. Clara took his hand and grazed it along her cheek. He looked at her and offered her a feeble smile, as she offered him a bright grin.

"Don't let her ruin your lunch, Doctor." She said.

The Doctor was still delved in his thoughts, so she took his hand and kissed his rough knuckles over and over until he came back to her.

'You don't give up, do you?" He said with a sad smile.

"Nah." She said, still holding his hand in hers. "And besides, why should I give up on my best friend who would never give up on me?"

* * *

 _ **A/N: feedback appreciated!**_


	11. Confessions

_**A/N: another chapter. Enjoy!**_

* * *

The Doctor helped her sit up from the chair. "Where off to next?"

"You should take a break, Doctor." Clara laughed.

"Break?" The time lord replied. "Break from what?

"From you taking care of me."

"Why should I stop?" This time, his reply was more serious.

And so was hers.

"Because... You seem tired and worried. It's already been..." She stopped. "How much has it been?"

The Doctor looked confused as well. He shook his hand to reveal his watch from behind his shirt. "Around 5 days."

"Sheesh." Clara giggled. "5 days without some time for yourself... That must be tough."

"I can't..." He stopped. The Doctor choked on a sob.

Clara suddenly looked concerned. "Doctor..." she removed the crutch opposite to her injured ankle. The Doctor's eyes widened as his hands curled around her hips.

"What do you think you're...?"

"Shush." She stopped him as she shook off the crutch, trying to let it fall to the floor, before placing her palm over his shoulder.

The Doctor tried to stop her. "Clara, please you'll get hurt. "

"Doctor will you stop?" She said, with a tone slightly louder than she wanted it to sound. The time lord bowed his head down, feeling hurt. "I'm sorry, Doctor. I didn't mean to hurt you." She cupped her palm on his cheek, letting her fingers smooth his skin, feeling the light stubble that had grown. The time lord leaned into her touch as a sign of forgiveness and empathy. "It's just... You keep on thinking about me without giving a little space to yourself. And I can't take it."

He did, but kept on holding her upright.

"I know you can't stop blaming yourself. But you have to stop. Please, Doctor, it's eating you up from the inside." Her eyes almost teared up. "I'll be fine. I promise you. But please," she started sobbing. The time lord felt confused. Had he just made her cry? His hands left her hips and his arms curled around her, hugging her to him, her nose nuzzled into his chest and her hand curled around him. "just stop beating yourself up." Her muffled voice expressed. "Stop suffering for nothing." She was shaking. Clara had had enough of seeing him so guilty. She had kept it all to herself for all those days because she felt powerless to tell him. But now, all that built up frustration was pouring into the Doctor's hearts, tears absorbed by his t-shirt which he hadn't changed in quite a while.

He pressed his nose into her hair. The vanilla smell was stronger than when he had last breathed her. He longed for it to control his panicked heartbeats. Even just seeing her eyes inflate or hearing her sob made his hearts go nuts. He kissed her head repetitevly, planting small, delicate kisses into her hair.

"I'm sorry I made you upset." he murmured.

Clara pulled back. "No no that's not the point." She was still trembling. Now it was out of exhaustion from staying on her foot.

"At least sit down and rest, Clara. We can talk this through."

"I'd like to go back to the Library, Doctor."

"I won't let you walk to it, though. You're tired." He directed her gently onto a nearby chair.

"I'll be fine." She replied as Clara tried to sit up. But he held her from her shoulders.

"You are not going anywhere on foot, Clara."

"But-"

"Doctor's orders."

She sulked.

"Come on. It's for your own good, Clara. Trust me."

The companion was able to sit up against the Doctor's wishes. "Doctor, just leave me... " She hissed as her injured foot accidentally rested on the floor. She slumped on the Doctor, her fingers curling around his tee in pain. The time lord pushed her back gently again and he helped her sit down on the chair, slowly lifting up her leg again. She hissed again, tears trickling down her cheeks.

"Is it _that_ bad?" She asked.

"Of course it's that bad, Clara. Your ligaments are torn. You have to get as much rest as you can."

"Fine." Her eyes rolled. She desperately tried to dry the tears with the back of her hand, hands shaking. The Doctor kneeled in front of her, took her trembling palms and pressed each one with his lips. Clara continued looking at him with inflated eyes. "I worry about you because I care for you. And I don't want you to suffer because of my reckless decisions. But I'll try and worry a little bit less."

Clara nodded feebly, avoid eye contact. "But it's not you fault, Doctor. I should have sent Missy to hell when she made me enter the dalek." She sniffed before the Doctor's arms reached out to her. She accepted the hug, burying her nose into the crevice of his neck. "This is really nice."

The time lord smiled warmingly. He finally pulled away, before cupping her cheeks with his huge flipper palms. His thumbs glided along her smooth skin, their eyes locking into each other's. "You'll be OK." He purred before pressing a kiss to her forehead. The Doctor continued by breathing into her hair. "And I'll be OK."

The Gallifreyan released himself gently from her hold, wrapping his arm around her waist and another under her knees, delicately lifting her.

"How's the pain?"

"Bit better." She tried her best to smile.

"Leave the crutches here. The TARDIS will bring them for you." She nodded. The time lord heaved her bridal style before walking through the corridor; Clara's arms curled around the Doctor's neck.

* * *

"Are you sure you want to stay alone, Clara? You know... With Missy... And all.. And what if-"

"Doctor." Her palm hugged his cheek that the time lord fet her warmth hugging him. Her smile radiated such happiness. "Stop worrying about me. I'll be fine."

He nodded, before he realised. "Oh... I was going to forget to give you this." He gave her a small pendent having a button. "If you're in any urgent danger, just press it and it will send a direct signal to me... In case you can't tell the TARDIS about it."

Clara nodded, a smile drawn on her face. "Thank you."

The time lord hesitated. "Are you sure...?"

"Yes Doctor." Clara sighed. "I'm a big girl. I think I can manage on my own with all the things life has thrown at me." The time lord remembered how upset she had been a few minutes ago in the kitchen. He nodded and smiled before sitting up, turning and walking towards the library door. "And go and take a wash!" She shouted before giggling. She couldn't see him but she knew he was chuckling also.

She sighed as the Doctor closed the door. Clara was very fortunate to have met the Doctor., so kind, so caring. So... So perfect.

She opened the book and continued reading.

The door opened again.

 _What did the Doctor want_ this _time?_

"Well well well..."

Clara jumped, and closed the book suddenly. Missy was leaning against the wall near the door, filing her nail. After a while, she looked up. "Oh... Did I give the poor puppet a fright?" Her heels echoed through the vast library as she made her way closer to Clara. The latter could feel her heart race, almost making its way out of her rib cage.

The button.

As soon as she turned to reach for it, Missy stopped her. "Tut tut, I though you would be happy to see me. Going off to tell your Doctor?"

Clara froze.

 _She wasn't a weakling._

 _She could face Missy on her own._

Except for her being the person who turned her boyfriend into a cyberman and almosy got the Doctor to kill her.

 _Yeah... There was nothing to be afraid of._

The girl returned to her previous position.

"Are you _scared_?" she smirked.

"Why would I be scared of you?" she said, steadying her voice.

"Oh Clara... No wonder I chose you." Missy laughed.

The girl tried to steady her trembling.

"Why would you do this?" Clara breathed.

Missy snorted. "What? Come visit you?"

Clara shook her head. "No... No... Why do you want to torture me...and the Doctor?"

The time lady laughed. "Because... You two are so adorable I just want to play with you."

"You want to play with us." Said Clara sarcastically. Now the girl felt encouraged to try and squeeze out the reason why the time lady was making their life a misery. But she wasn't quite ready to leave the Doctor yet (she would never bring herself to leave completely, no matter how hard she tried).

Missy laughed as hard as she could, yet the companion was not at all amused. Her laughter had died down slowly. "I'm sorry. I'm-I'm sorry. I couldn't help myself." She said breathlessly, the reminents of her laughs still trailing in her voice. "Why _not_? After all... You make quite a couple." She said teasingly.

Clara rolled her eyes. "And?"

"And..." The Gallifreyan continued as she leaned against a bookshelf near the fireplace. "I want to prove to the Doctor that I'm just like him; a Doctor of my own." She twirled the nail file like a magic wand in the air whilst she was talking and reasoning out, before resuming to filing her nails.

"Seriously? You kill for a living, Missy. You enjoy creating havoc like the day you rose the dead as cybermen. Don't you _dare_ tell me that's something which the Doctor would do... Something which would make the Universe a better place."

Missy stopped filing, as she was taken aback before recomposing herself; laughing and making fun of the situation. "The pupper's angry now..."

"Oh, shut up will you?!" Missy stopped, sat upright again before placing her hands on her waist. Clara was infuriated. "The Doctor wants to bring some sense in you, and I totally agree. Because I know how alone he feels in the Universe after what happened to Gallifrey, especially after _you_ gave him the wrong coordinates. But if it weren't for him, I would have killed you properly a long time ago."

"That's what you thought the day of the cybermen invasion, right?" Missy smirked.

Clara swallowed thickly. She thought that Kate's father killed the time lady. She had that sneaky plan of recharging her vortex manipulator. And thank goodness for that. She would have ended up as a lifeless body on the ground.

"You know how many times the Doctor tried to get rid of me? Do you know how many times I've died? And yet... Here I am! I'm the Master of Havoc, Clara. Me and the Doctor have a complex friendship, more than your own species." Missy scoffed. "And you lot think marriage is complicated."

She was going to turn away before turning on her heel again.

"Oh, speaking about marriage. Your _boyfriend_ ; he was a cute one, you know? Poor love. I chose him just for you, transferred him to Coal Hill after leaving the military when he killed that poor boy he sent to you a few days after you kicked him out of your life." Clara stopped breathing.

It was true. She had kicked him out that time when he said he loved her. She wasn't sure if it was him. "I knew you would like him." Missy winked. Clara's teeth grinded together painfully as she tried to hold back the stinging sensation in her eyes. "Oh, and that part... He was walking across the street... Poor thing, I must have been going on a high speed... I didn't see him." She said in a sarcastically saddening tone.

Her life was being controlled by this.. This maniac. There was no better way to describe Missy. She wanted to sit up and wrap her fingers around the time lady's neck but apart from the fact that she had an injured ankle, the girl was paralysed by shock. No one ever knew who hit Danny, and she probably found the answer to that question.

9 months had passed, and the investigation had ran cold.

But Danny... He was so sad. He wanted his emotions to be wiped out. He couldn't take the hurt... The fact that Clara didn't believe him, the confession about the Doctor and all...

 _"He is the closest person to me in this whole world. He is the man I will always forgive, always trust. The one man I would never, ever lie to."_

Danny had heard that.

Clara didn't notice that her gaze had fell to her hands. The hands which held the sonic that time she activated the inhibitor... Her fingertips feeling every switch inside the breastplate, trying to find a way to inhibit the emotions which were killing him once again.

The sonic trembling in her hand as she pointed it towards him.

"Oh well, I must get going to the gym. I want to prepare for the next invasion. Toodloo."

The heels echoed through the library before she exited the huge room, leaving the large door open.

The girl couldn't even breathe. She remembered Danny, full of blood, concussed on thhe pavement, the nurses trying to resuscitate him in the ambulance...

She remembered the day the cyberman took his face plate off. Danny was in pain, and she had hurt him. It was because of her he had died in the first place. And she had known that a long time ago. She couldn't accept that someone would die or sacrifice himself because of her.

That was why she threatened the Doctor to brink him back. It was true that she had grown less fond to Danny than with time travel (the Doctor... In actual fact). But the latter didn't want to keep the same relationship they once had. But she had lied to Danny. 3 months of time travel went unnoticed by him because Clara had become such a good liar. He was a victim.

Danny had died and it was her fault.

* * *

The Doctor walked through the corridor after having his shower, wearing a white shirt having its first 2 buttons opened and a comfortable pair of trousers. He was smiling, thinking about how lucky he was to have Clara in his life.

But as soon as he saw the Library door open, he froze. He could have sworn he left it closed, so Clara could have her own privacy.

Crying. He could hear her distinct cry. "Clara." He breathed as he entered. Seeing her twisted, her face into the pillow, her injured leg in the same position.

"Clara..." He rested his hand on her shoulder. She flinched.

"Don't _touch_ me." She shouted. She momentarily stopped crying, before turning to the time lord. Her eyes were inflated, bloodshot, and looked scared.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry Doctor." She hugged him tightly. "I... I thought you were..."

"Missy..." He said. He could feel his blood boil inside him, his hearts race.

She had come into the Library, all the proof pointed towards that conclusion. And she had said something upsetting to her.

"I'm going to kill that-"

He was stopped by Clara's short nailed digging into his short (and skin beneath).

Little by little, the girl's sobs diminished to shaky breaths and sniffs.

"Don't let anger do this to you, Doctor. You'd never kill. Please... Don't do this now."

"What if she...?"

"I don't care. Do what you think is right. Don't always think about me, Doctor. If you really want to stop her from causing havoc in the universe, then do it. I'll try my best to stay out of the way as possible when she's there, though."

"I won't let-"

Clara shushed the Doctor, before cupping her palm to his cheek. "You're not a warrior. Promise me you won't hurt her or kill her... Ever. Not even if they make you do it."

He bit his lip.

"Please." She breathed.

"OK."

"Swear it... On something that matters."

"You..." He breathed desperately, his voice broken, his eyes shattered. " _You_ matter."

Clara held her breath, letting her hand slip from his cheek before licking her lips. "Um... Uh... OK." Her eyes never met his, no matter how much the Doctor wanted.

"Clara..." The Doctor cupped her cheek delicately, urging her to look into his eyes. "I won't do it. Because you're right; I'm not a warrior. And I promise you... I swear on this whole Universe and any parallel Universe existing, on every planet we've saved, on our relationship... I will try my best to make Missy turn good. Because it's right. I swear."

"Good." the girl said, trying her best to hold back the tears. She breathed a laugh. "And you'd better keep that oath, because you have me to take care of."

His fingers continued to caress her skin. "Oath and no Oath, Clara Oswald, I would never cease to protect you." He purred. The time lord took her hand and wrapped his paddle-like palms around it. Clara's eyes drifted from his hands to his eyes. The Doctor tried to speak up, he tried to remain calm. Yet, his hearts betrayed him. "I... I..." He swallowed.

Clara shushed him, letting her hand cup his cheek once again. "I know." She breathed with a smile. "No need to worry about saying anything."

He released a held breath, smiling. One of the Doctor's hands left her hand and cradled the other on his cheek. His face turned towards it and planted a kiss on her palm. The girl blushed ever so slightly. She, then, let her fingers free from his, and proceeded to pass them though his soft silver curls before planting the softest kiss on his forehead. "I do too." She breathed.


	12. The Snog Box

_**A/N: New chapter! Enjoy!**_

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The Doctor had decided that Clara should stay in the console room to keep her safe from any contact with Missy (and also to keep each other company... Especially to keep each other company). The TARDIS had brought a chaise lounge for Clara and was reading, waiting anxiously for the Doctor to return. She had to say, she was relatively cautious an alert, in case Missy was to come drifting into the console 'casually' and start teasing her. No matter how much Clara had told him that she was going to be OK, he wouldn't listen.

 _"You're staying with me now. You'll be under my care."_

 _"Doctor... I'm a grown woman. I'm sure I can-"_

 _"No no no. I won't risk entering the room and hearing you crying again. I won't let you get hurt again."_

 _"I wasn't crying because of Missy..."_

 _The Doctor's eyebrows arched._

 _"It's true!" She insisted._

 _The Doctor didn't budge._

 _"Fine." She mumbled, once she understood that the Doctor ouldnt be so easily tricked. Not when he knew her_ that _well._

Thank goodness the Doctor returned before any of her fears came to be. He entered the console with 2 brown paper take-away bags. "Dinner's here!" The Doctor exclaimed as he walked to the console; making Clara laugh with the remark. He placed the bags on the console, opened them and started taking out boxes and chopsticks. To be exact, 3 boxes, 3 pairs of sticks and a smaller paper bag. "So this is..." The Doctor opened and smelled the contents. "Pork..." He placed it near him on the console. Pulling out another... "Another pork." Clara was watching him enthusiastically from behind the book as his eyebrows where in attack form as he tried to smell the different boxes of noodles. "So... This should be..." He took a whiff before smiling. "Yes... Chicken ramen for Ms. Oswald." He purred, looking at her, his lips curled in a delicate, loving smile. Clara blushed slightly, forgetting for just a brief moment that she was famished. He walked near her and handed her the box, some tissues and chopsticks.

"Thanks Doctor." The companion replied, hastily opening the packet of chopsticks and digging them inside the noodle cup.

"Call Missy, dear." He said to the TARDIS as the time lord patted the console. She responded in shrills only the Doctor could understand... Well, Clara had gotten used to the different tones used by the machine so she could easily feel the disgust the time machine felt. "Yes, I know you don't like her, but please, do it for me." The Doctor pleaded. The column pulsated in surrender and did as her thief told her (but Clara could only imagine how the TARDIS was going to call that crazy lady). Soon, both the Doctor, who was sitting on an armchair the TARDIS had also materialised there, and Clara were both slurping the noodles in what otherwise would have been complete silence (adding the machine's soothing humming sound too...) .

"Oh, look, the noodles are here." they heard, and they didn't have to look up to know whose voice it was. "What took you so long, Missy?" He asked without even making ey contact, trying to collect another batch of ramen to eat. "I was playing." She replied, walking towards the noodle box. "That PlayStation 18 you have in the games room is so so awesome..." She took the noodle box and chopsticks before turning and walking towards the corridor. "I'll be playing 'Resident Evil: Revenge' if anyone needs me." and she disappeard, the sound of her heels slowly trailing to nothing.

Soon enough, the Doctor finished from his ramen, whilst Clara was still eating it slowly as she was reading.

"What are you reading?" The Doctor asked her. She showed him the cover. "Oh, The Silmarillion..." the Doctor exclaimed. "Met Tolkien quite a few times... Lovely chap, invited me for tea once in his home, very philosophical in his ideas." Clara smiled. He looked interested, so she asked him to sit by her and let her read him a part of the book. "No, no, you're hungry, Clara. Some other time maybe." He said, not looking into her eyes but moving towards the console to continue repairing it. She tried her best to move to one side, placed the noodle box on the table and patted the empty space near her. The Doctor hesitated, but soon sat near her; always facing her.

Clara continued reading from where she had stopped.

And as she read, the Doctor's hearts softened, as what happened every time. He knew they were perfect for each other; Missy had done the math long ago, that time she gave Clara a phone number: "best helpline in the Universe".

She continued reading about elves, and dwarves, and the creation of Morgoth and Sauron... And all the fiction Tolkien had written.

She was soon able to finish the chapter, before gazing at the time lord. He looked rather interested in what she was reading...

No... Not really.

He was interested... In her!

"Doctor?" Clara asked, relatively anxious at the fact that he stood still, almost not breathing.

The Doctor gazed into his companion's glazed eyes. She was so amazing, so beautiful, so... So...

Perfect.

The impulse the Doctor felt was completely involuntary. It felt like Clara was pulling him into her aura, her space, like a magnet. His lips met hers, pressing Clara's head against the soft back of the lounge. Clara gasped, but soon melted into his grasp, moaning with the rush of emotions through her brain; pleasure, affection, mostly. Love. Not before long she started kissing back. She felt his fingers passing smoothly through her hair, as soon did hers in his hair, playing with his short silver curles.

The companion would have never thought that their love would escalate so quickly... Just after a few days.

But after all, it had been there all the time, wasn't it? Since the beginning of their History together.

The Impossible Doctor and the Impossible Man, running after each other. The Girl saves the boy by laying down her life (most of the time), whilst the Man runs to her aid, only bale to hear those final words which would always water the seed in his hearts, the seed which would bring him back to her again and again.

The time lord pulled back slowly, being close enough to Clara for his nose to rub against hers, stroking it delicately, eyed both closed, breathing each other's warm air. "The pork ramen tastes better than my chicken ramen."

"Of all times, Clara Oswald, you can't help yourself but say it." He said as his fingertips laced her smooth cheeks; much softer than cotton candy.

"Does it change anything?" Clara asked cheekily. The Doctor answered with a wide grin.

"Of course not." He finished the sentence with a low chuckle.

They soon heard the sound of someone clearing their throat. Their eyes flashed wide open as they looked a few metres away at the opening of the corridor, where Missy was holding an opened Chinese noodle box. "I know you two are madly in love with each other so, sorry for bothering you, "She stepped on the stairs and walked towards the console. "but forgot the prawn crackers on the console."

The Doctor's hand slipped off Clara's cheek, before preparing to get up. "I... Um...-"

He was soon stopped by a hand slipping into his, holding him down. The Doctor looked at Clara, who had pleading eyes. "Please stay." She breathed.

"Oh continue, please, please do!" Said Missy, who was still near the console and had just grabbed the paper bag full of freshly-made prawn crackers. She walked towards the stairs, before stopping and turning to the two, who were staring at her. "What are you waiting for? Snog on." And she disappeared into the corridor with the bag and noodle pot.

The Doctor turned towards Clara, who had turned to look at him and was slightly blushed. "I'm... I'm sorry... about Missy," the Doctor began. "I'm-" but his words were soon cut off by a soft kiss from Clara. It was so pleasant and sweet, the Doctor felt like melting, surrendering to that sweet gesture as her soft lips pressed his. Clara was the one that pulled away this time.

"Now it's a snog box indeed, isn't it, Doctor?" Clara breathed a laugh. The time lord pecked his lips to hers.

"If you say so, boss." The companion giggled as the Doctor's finger tips glided on her smooth neck, the companion feeling a slight shiver down her spine. "I have to continue the console, Clara." He purred.

"No, stay, Doctor." Clara grinned. "The TARDIS can wait."

The Doctor couldn't help but smile. "Besides, you're hungry." The Doctor replied.

"Doesn't matter." The companion grinned, but the Doctor purred yet again.

"That's debatable, teach." Clara pulled slightly back.

"Why?" She asked, before the he pecked the corner of her lips.

"Because you were biting my bottom lip like crazy during our first kiss." The Doctor laughed.

"That's called love, daft old man." She said before diving into another kiss, twisting curling his silver locks around her fingers whilst feeling the Doctor's fingers passing through her short hair, the tips rubbing against her skull. They both pulled away simultaneously. "Did I ever tell you you're a phenomenal kisser for a 2000 year old time lord, Doctor?"

"A first, teach." He chuckled, before gazing into her large doe eyes that could swallow him whole (he wouldn't mind it, actually). "I really have to go now." He breathed a laugh before pulling away. "And continue eating your Chinese." He said as the time lord paced to the console, diving under it to continue the repair, chuckling as Clara continued twisting the chopsticks and eat noodles reading the book without actually understanding what she was reading.

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 _ **A/N: Hope you enjoyed this chapter. Feedback appreciated as always!**_

 _ **I don't know if I going to update it again, though. I have another chapter in mind but it's going to take longer than expected to write.**_


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